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Let's talk...
🕑 Added 2024-09-20 22:49:42 +0000 UTCI was really hoping to finish this by today, but I doubt that'll be the case. I am super close, so I'll hold off on updates until I finish within the next few days.
But, let's talk about Episode 2...
I've decided to completely overhaul it, and here's what I'm thinking.
We begin with a flashback, of when Max and Warren first talk about sex in their relationship. It begins when the two of them are at Max's dorm, watching TV. sure enough, they're watching a documentary of the recently discovered Majika Empire.
It'll be a documentary with censored sex scenes that will also give Warren the idea to bring up sex. Max will decline and say to wait. Then we catch up to Max's interview and she'll say something about the blow-bang with the Chocolate Daddy to remind the viewers it's connected.
At first, she'll talk about the porn that she found Warren watching. Mainly, Warren loves cuck porn. So by Max doing what she's doing, she thinks she's doing something good for Warren, giving him what he wants.. So Naive, Max.
Anyways...
She'll explain that a week went by after the blow-bang... she felt absolutely terrible. Of course Jefferson is a master manipulator and convinces her that it's what Warren wants. I think too, we'll do another mini-flashback to when Warren and Brooke were in Nathan's dorm watching Max's blow bang.
We will still see Victoria, but I think I want to use Lord Aardvark's model of her rather than MagMallow's. Anyhow... Max will be at that porn shop earlier that day. Turns out, she was servicing other men in a porno theater.
Because I know the public, people will complain if I do three videos straight of only Max giving BJ's or handjobs, she'll be servicing men at the porn theater while they watch "Mark Jefferson's Arcadia Bay Girls" or something like that.
So, I'll be mixing in clips of Max playing with other guys, which we see what's on the theater. Victoria having sex. In the end of Episode 1, we saw a glimpse of Kate with the Chocolate Daddy. So we'll see what went down there.
Anyhow... Possibly a Chloe scene too, but not with Coach. Coach and Chloe will be saved for the OF storyline. Because I can't imagine a 5 part story with Max and Chloe not involved somehow. Again, the other LiS girls, it's just so Max could see what she's missing out on. Also to have some sort of full blown sex in the episode.
I don't think I'll portray the girls as virgins though. Virgin Defloration should be its own story. So when we see Kate, it's going to be after her encounter with the Chocolate Daddy. I think all the girls will say they lost it to the Chocolate Daddy just as a nod, which will give Max that FOMO feeling.
Also, as part of Warren's porn that Max found, there was one in particular that caught her attention. Which is what propelled her to give into Jefferson's manipulation. Warren cut and pasted Max's face photos on the girls in the Majika Empire documentary.
So, the reason why Max was taking a shower in the first episode, she was to a medical exam by Skell Technologies, who wants to verify she's a virgin for the tribute since she's played around a bit. They want to make sure her virginity, the hymen is still in tact.
This is just a rough idea, I know it may seem like I'm all over the place with it. I'm just dropping ideas as I type it out. But once I start working on it, I'll have a more clear picture.
Comments
Crossroads Radio
I've been wanting to work on it. Don't worry, my goal is to get it done by Halloween.
N8.f2
When Hermoine? 😀
Crossroads Radio
I think what I'll do, the forum that Max finds, it won't be just the Majika. It'll be other types of porn as well. I'm gonna try to keep it on LiS girls. As for Kate, perhaps maybe not a gloryhole. I'm actually tempted to do that for Max again. I think the plan originally was her trying to rub one off watching her fiends in actual movies. But the booth she's in, is also a gloryhole. Here's what I'm thinking, her blowback scene, someone's actually watching it in the booth next door and she peeks and sees him jacking off. It turns her on she gives in and decides to service him. "It's just a blow job, she thinks. As long as she doesn't go all the way, she's not crossing a line she hasn't already crossed. At least that's her thoughts. She's still going to watch the other movies with possibly Chloe, Victoria, or Kate. I think we'll get a better look at the forum after. Jefferson will look into it more and find an entry about the Majika. Of course, we who are up to date already know Max ends up in the Majika, but when I release this work in the future, the viewers may not know how the story unfolds.
Sajanto
Okay, that makes sense with your original concept you eventually scrapped. I'm actually very glad with the way you changed the story so far as the way it is now definitely feels more appealing (to me at least). :) The ideas for the other girls also sound nice and as for Kate... it might be too much of a cliche, but maybe Jefferson "allured" her into what she initially thought was a confession booth, but it was actually a gloryhole booth, so to speak. Then one thing led to another. :P The online forum idea actually sounds really good and (to me) a lot better than the photo paste idea. :) Maybe it could be the same board he got the uncensored documentary from, so everything is connected in a way.
Crossroads Radio
Originally, the shower sequence was because everything was supposed to have happened already. Warren was supposed to find out about everything after the fact. That was also when originally Max was going to be locked in an old apartment in the rough side of the neighborhood. Originally, my thought was, Max would be silent because she knows she did something bad. But got cleaned up before Warren gets there. Then he would finally find the final footage of Max going all the way. And the video would end with Warrn looking at Max laying on her bed, then a streak of cum would dribble down her leg, then it would cut... then roll the BLACKED To The Max title card. But yeah, Episode 2 is a filler for sure. It's how we get from Arcadia Bay to the Majika Empire. But I want the girls to look like they're having an awesome time making porn. Victoria is in a high end club. Chloe is in a rock concert, and Kate... haven't decided... gloryhole. She's that holy, Dirty Kate. Then again, I thought about it. I was thinking, Max, or Jefferson finds out Warren was actually writing in forums about his fantasy regarding Max in the ritual. Then yeah, your idea of Max seeing the package.
Sajanto
Very nice concept. :) To be fair, I always felt that Episode 2 was more of a "filler episode" so far (don't get me wrong, it's wasn't bad by any means, just not as memorable as the other ones). so a remake seems like a great idea. :) The beginning with the documentary sounds amazing and gives a lot more impact to the whole narrative and also makes some actions by both Warren and Max more understandable, especially Max's mixed feelings about the blowbang in the beginning and Jefferson's role in all of it. The expansion of Max's visit to the porn shop also adds a lot to the story and the idea of Max serving other men sounds really nice. The idea of Jefferson's movie with other LIS girls running in the background is particularly great. Victoria and Kate being in it sounds amazing and the possibility of Chloe being involved is also nice, but I see your point of not making it too similar to the pending OF project with her. Especially the part about Max seeing what she is missing out that way sound awesome. :) I still have somewhat mixed feelings about the "paste Max's face in the documentary" thing - on the one hand it's certainly kinky and twisted, but maybe it's too much of a "head start" to the actual action later and also maybe too many "weird" things at once. Perhaps instead, Max simply finds the uncensored documentary (as opposed to the censored one on TV) on Warren's computer which he seems to be watching over and over. With Max now seeing these scenes also uncensored herself (including the obvious "packages" :P ) she make the decision to give into the temptation – both because Warren seems to like the sexual Majika rituals and also because Max's desire to be part of something like that now fully overwhelms her. The shower sequence about the intact hymen also makes sense to me, so that's a thumbs-up. :) So far, a lot of really amazing ideas and I can't wait for you to present us results in due time. :)
