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Problems with Breaking Up with the RWBY Girls - Chapter 2
🕑 Added 2024-04-03 08:45:17 +0000 UTCNext chapter of Breaking Up. Also the one where we switch to an M rating since I'll be putting in more risque segments. Probably should've done that for Blake, but oh well.
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Going out with Weiss should've been a dream come true. After months of persistence and powering through dozens of her rejections, he'd finally done it. His Snow Angel had said yes. She'd finally agreed and said that she was willing to give him a chance. She warned him that she was a strict mistress and that if he was expecting her to fall into his arms then he was going to be sorely disappointed. She told him that he had one last chance to back off then and there and he, utter fool that he was, said he'd never give up.
Oh, how he would strangle past Jaune now if he had the chance.
He still remembered it like it was just yesterday. After she said yes, he came back to team JNPR's dorm room in a happy daze. Nora, the sweet girl that she was, congratulated him on finally managing to do it. Ren was more doubtful but still wished him luck like a good brother from another mother. And then there was Pyrrha. She was so happy for him that she'd cried tears of joy. He made sure to tell her that it was all because of her that he and Weiss were together now.
That made her cry even more joyful tears. Such an amazing and caring partner he had.
It should've been smooth sailing from then on.
...
Should being the operative word.
Weiss wasn't kidding about being strict. She was a Schnee, and they only ever allowed for the best. His grades, his clothes, even the way he styled his hair; all of it had to be altered to fit her standards. He took it all without complaint even when she made him throw away his favorite hoodie. Pumpkin Pete was not good enough for someone who'd eventually take the Schnee name. The fact that Weiss was already considering the idea of marrying him made him feel lightheaded and he agreed to toss the hoodie into the garbage.
He could still hear Pete's cries of betrayal even now...
And then came the etiquette lessons.
"No, no, no!" Weiss snapped harshly. Jaune winced as his five-foot-nothing girlfriend towered over him, and it wasn't just because he was sitting down on the way-too-hard seat. She glared down at him with her hands on her hips and her lips curled in a scowl that would make Grimm cower, "How many times do we have to go over this, Jaune? You use the soup fork! Are you trying to embarrass me?"
A fork...for soup. He thought Weiss was joking at first, but she was dead serious. Maybe this was just him being a dumb country boy, but he didn't see the point of it. Then again, Atlesians had eleven-course meals too, so...
"Here, Jaune. See?" She sat across from him again and used the fork to pick up a little bit of the soup with the root. Somehow, she managed to make it look dignified and not completely stupid, "It's easy. I was doing this since was three."
"Why can't you just use a spoon?" he asked for what must have been the fifth time that day.
"Because we're not boors, Jaune." She sniffed, "Now, I see that it isn't sinking in just yet. We'll have to start over from the beginning. Clear your schedule for the next couple of days. We won't stop until it's absolutely perfect.
Endure it. Just endure it, he told himself as he dipped the fork into the cream soup. He'd tried for months to get together with Weiss and she'd finally given him a chance. Wasn't one of the reasons he fell for her because of her elegance? What was he complaining about? He could learn whatever weird Atlesian manners she wanted. It would be all worth it in the e-
"By the way, I'll also need to teach you how to eat a pit-saa properly." Pizza, he mentally corrected. For some reason, some words just didn't translate well into the Common tongue, "I've tolerated the others eating it with their bare hands like savages, but you're my boyfriend. You need to learn the proper way to do so."
"And...what way is that?" Jaune asked, already dreading the answer.
She gave him the biggest, brightest smile and said, "With a spork, of course."
...
It took everything he had not to cry then and there.
But he could deal with that too. He could deal eating soup with a fork and pizza with a spork, even if Yang and Ruby looked at him like he'd kicked Zwei off of Beacon's edge. He could do it. He could.
...And then Weiss showed off the Mistress part of that strict mistress warning.
Like many men his age, Jaune was a ball of hormones. Being at Beacon hadn't helped that at all. Huntresses were some of the most attractive women on Remnant, easily putting many models to shame, and his friends were no exception. Yang, Blake, Nora, and even Ruby had their appeal. And while he'd never do anything since she was his partner, objectively, he knew Pyrrha was attractive too.
Weiss herself looked like she'd stepped right out of a fairy tale and he'd woken to some ruined underwear more than a few times ever since his crush on her...what? It wasn't like he did it intentionally or anything! He couldn't control his dreams!
The thought of going further than kissing and holding hands - as lewd as it already was - had definitely crossed his mind, but he tried not to think about it. Weiss was so obsessed with being proper that he figured the only time anything like that would ever happen was after the wedding. He didn't mind. He'd made do with pictures before and a few years to be with his Snow Angel was a price he was willing to pay.
Oh, he was so wrong.
Coming back to his room to Weiss in lingerie should've been the hottest thing ever. He still remembered her sultry smile and come hither pose as he stepped inside. She told him that the rest of team JNPR would be out for the day and they'd have all the time in the world. He didn't even question when Weiss asked him to get on his knees on the floor after he took his clothes off, Jaune Junior saluting in all his glory.
And then she put the collar around his neck.
Yeah...turned out, Weiss was repressed. How repressed? 'Good Brothers worshipping girl who went to church every Sunday' level repressed. Yeah. She'd barely gotten the collar around his neck when she brought out the chains, ballgag, and a riding crop.
"We're going to have so much fun tonight, Jaune~!" she cooed, her innocent smile not at all matching the eager way she snapped the riding crop against her palm, "Beacon dorms are soundproof too, so...scream as much as you want."
"Meep."
Weiss tapped his chin with the riding crop and slowly trailed the tip down to his chest then finally his twitching member. Jaune Junior shivered alongside his dad and Weiss cooed again, "I see you're just as excited as I am. That's good." With agonizing slowness, she dragged it around his member in lazy circles and breathed out through her mouth happily as he squirmed, "That's right. I'm your mistress and you're my dog. I'm in control here. Me."
"Weiss-"
"Dogs do not talk!" Weiss snapped with a sudden ferocity, "Bark for me!"
"Uh...w-woof?"
"Louder!
"W-Woof, woof!"
"That's it! Just like that!" Weiss' face was practically boiling red now and she looked drunk from the power of it all, "You're going to be my pet - my toy - now, Jaune. Do you like that, hm?" She leaned forward and cupped his jaw with her free hand, "Give yourself to me."
"Uh..." He had to admit he'd had dreams like this, specifically of Weiss in a military outfit, complete with fancy hate. No, he had no idea why that specifically. Regardless, seeing his dream come true wasn't as great as it should've been...
"Are you disobeying your mistress?" She bared her teeth and turned around to pull out something else. He didn't get the chance to ask before she pulled out a small metal device with a Schnee logo emblazoned at the side, "I'm going to have to train that out of you. Well, some time with this rebellious thing-" she pushed against his cock with her right foot, "-caged should make you more obedient. How long, I wonder? One month? No, I think three would be good. Yes, three months will be plenty." She gave him the brightest, sweetest smile as she presented the chastity cage to him, "Put it on."
"Could we...take it slow?" Jaune gulped.
"Nope," she said, popping the P, "Oh, I can't wait to see you struggling, begging to get off but unable to. It'll be so amazing." She let out a perverted little giggle then drew closer, "Oh, put it on now! I can't wait any longer! I wanna hear you beg!"
...
Alright, he'd reached his limit!
He stood up without warning, making Weiss jump back in shock. Without a word said, he put on all his clothes, ignoring her protests about disobeying and how she really wanted him to do this. He was her boyfriend, she said. Didn't he want to make her happy?
"I wanna break up."
"...What?" Weiss asked, looking up at him with wide, dumbfounded eyes. Seeing her like that hurt, but he knew it had to be done, "Weiss, sorry, this isn't working out."
"You're breaking up with me?" Weiss grit her teeth, her look of surprise fading into a fierce glare that looked terrifying despite her state of undress, "You hassled me for months to go out with you and now you're breaking up with me? Is this some kind of sick joke!?"
"...Sorry." Jaune winced. Sounding like that, it did come off as pretty dickish of him. Especially since he was walking off what would've been their first time. But he knew he had to do it. For his sake and the sake of Jaune Junior, "Look, you're a great girl and all, but-"
"Stop. Stop talking right now." Weiss turned around and growled. He had to resist the urge to look down at her schneehind. He did just break up with her, "Jaune...I am warning you right now, you are going to regret this. Do you think I'm just some woman you could have your fun with and then abandon like some Valean harlot? Cause you are sorely mistaken."
First off, racist. Second, fun? He had to learn how to eat soup with a fork without looking like an idiot. And he thought training with Pyrrha was hard.
But of course, he didn't say that cause he wasn't a dick, "Sorry...could we still be friends?"
Weiss rounded on him again with absolute murder in her eyes. For a moment, he wondered if she'd hit him. Instead, her expression suddenly morphed into a serene smile, "Alright, fine, you've made your choices. Now let's see if you can live with the consequences."
With that last, ominous warning, she picked up her 'toys' and left the room, not even bothering to put clothes on over her lingerie. Jaune watched her go guiltily then slumped down on his bed. Ugh, this really wasn't how he imagined it all going.
Of course, both their teams knew about the breakup the next day. The mood at breakfast was heavy and painfully awkward. No one said a word and poor Ruby looked like she was torn on who she should try to comfort between her guy bestie and girl bestie. For some reason, though, Pyrrha was all smiles and silently supported him ever since he woke up. It just wasn't meant to be, she said that morning, but there were other fish in the sea. Maybe closer than he thought.
Ah...she was such a good friend.
The creepiest part was Weiss. She didn't scream or rage or anything. She greeted him good morning like they hadn't just broken up last night and ate her food quietly without a word. He had a bad feeling...
A feeling that was soon vindicated when he'd barely finished his meal and the door to the cafeteria opened. A pale man in a crisp white suit stepped in, managing to look out of place even in Beacon. His dark hair was slicked back and the thin glasses over his sharp eyes only made Jaune squirm in his seat when their gazes met. He went over to their table without any hesitation, not breaking eye contact with Jaune once.
"Jaune Arc, I presume?" the older man asked.
"Uh...yeah?" Jaune swallowed.
"Good. Very good. My name is Richard Blanche and I'll be the representative to Ms. Schnee for the upcoming divorce proceedings."
...
"Wait, what?!" Jaune stood, slamming both hands on the table. Across from him, Weiss smirked, "Wh-What do you mean divorce?! We're not even married?"
"What does that have to do with anything?" Blanche raised a very unimpressed brow, "Were you or were you not Ms. Schnee's boyfriend up until last night? Yes or no?"
"I- well, yeah, but-"
"No further clarification needed." He handed Jaune a long stack of documents, "The trial will commence in a week's time at the Beacon auditorium. Details are all in the documents. I suggest getting a lawyer and settling your affairs." He turned on his heel and left, leaving Jaune staring gobsmacked at the thick pile of documents in his hands. This was way too elaborate to be a joke.
"Well, that's that," Weiss said. Her smile was utterly smug and self-assured, "I'll see you in court, Jaune." She picked up her tray and left without giving him a chance to respond.
"Oooh sucks to be you, Vomit Boy." Yang hissed.
"Uh...this is a joke, right?" Jaune asked dumbly, "There's no way she can actually take me to court for breaking up with her! We weren't even married!"
"What does that have to do with anything?" Blake asked in the same tone as Blanche, "You know she's Atlesian, right?"
"Well, yeah, but that doesn't-"
"Atlesians aren't like us Valeans," Yang said, voice serious, "They're like beavers. They mate for life. Once they agree to go out with someone, that's permanent. It doesn't matter if you didn't put a ring on her yet. And in the eyes of Atlas law, you were married the second she said yes. Why do you think it took her months to say yes? It was a really big decision for her...and then you broke up with her. So yeah, you kinda dug your own hole here."
"What?!" Jaune slammed his hands on the table again, "Why didn't anyone tell me?!"
"Why should we have to?" Yang scoffed, "It's so obvious! Why do you think no one asked Weiss-cream out even though she's so popular? Cause that shit's a commitment, VB. Everyone knows that! Why do you think Weiss' parents are still together?" Because rich people liked to be miserable, he thought, "How could you not know? That's like not knowing what Aura is!"
...
Shit, there was nothing he could say to that, was there?
"Well, in Jaune's defense, I didn't know that either," Pyrrha said weakly.
"Ah...no offense, Pyrrha, but you are somewhat...sheltered." Ren put a hand on her shoulder. His partner looked offended and desperately tried (and failed) to not let it show, "To anyone else, it would be common knowledge. Nora and I were aware and we hadn't left Anima up until we enrolled in Beacon."
"Yeah! I thought Jaune-Jaune was super determined 'cause he really liked Weiss," Nora added, "I mean, he serenaded her in front of her room! I thought he was in it for life! Cause why the heck would you do something so cringy if you weren't up to the commitment?" Cringy? He thought it was romantic!
"Even I knew that, and I think that dating stuff's gross." Ruby stuck her tongue out.
"Well, I didn't!" Jaune groaned and slammed his head on the table, "...You guys think Weiss'll give me a pass if I said I didn't know?"
"Yeah...no." Yang crossed her arms, "You shoulda seen her last night. She was heartbroken. Not like crying or anything, but she looked like she got her heart torn out. She's got a grudge, and she's not letting it go. My advice? Get a good lawyer."
"I can't afford a good lawyer!" Jaune sat up and groaned.
"Well it's either that or you beg and hope Weiss gives you mercy, but I'm not gonna hold my breath." Yang shrugged, "Sorry, but like I said, you kinda dug your own hole here."
The next seven days were some of the most nerve-wracking in his entire life, and that included the time Cardin blackmailed him. News about the upcoming trial had spread like wildfire all across the school and it was all anyone could talk about. Beacon was an international school, so they had no choice but to accept the trial and accommodate Weiss' demands. (Not)Marriage laws were a big deal and couldn't be ignored. Classes were suspended for their teams so they could 'get their affairs' in order. He was too stressed to even enjoy it.
Jacques Schnee was putting everything he had into helping his daughter. He didn't know if it was cause he secretly cared about Weiss or didn't like how some Valean bumpkin embarrassed her, but it made life way harder. No lawyer would take up his case. Granted they would've refused once they figured out he had no cash on him, but they did it before the topic of money even came up.
Even worse, Weiss had gotten to his team...okay, she'd gotten mostly to Nora. She was all smiles and offered to take them out to dinner or some other place out in town so 'it wouldn't be so hard for them'. Pyrrha had refused out of solidarity as his partner, but Nora was shameless about it, letting Weiss spoil her and take her out to restaurants and even an amusement park(!) that weekend.
"What do you want from me, Jaune-Jaune? I've been an orphan as long as I can remember! Let me have this!" she cried when Jaune tried to call her out.
Ren had stayed out of it, though Jaune didn't miss the 'care packages' Weiss sent his way that he pointedly didn't refuse or throw away. Jaune wanted to call him out on it, but he didn't like the idea of getting another 'I'm a poor, helpless orphan who's never had anything' guilt trip.
Soon enough, the day of the trial came. Jaune put on one of the suits Weiss bought for him and walked to the auditorium like a man being sent to his execution. It was crowded; practically the entire campus was in the audience. Even his parents and sisters were there, though he pointedly refused to meet their eyes. This entire thing was enough of a shame already.
Ren stopped him before he could make his way to his seat, "Jaune, please tell me you got a lawyer, at least."
"Of course I did." Jaune huffed.
"Oh good, for a second I thought that-"
"Blake said she'd represent me."
"ARE YOU INSANE?!"
Ren's sudden scream made Jaune jump. He'd never heard his brother from another mother shout even when Nora covered their entire room in red sap (long story). He didn't have time to dwell on the shocking swerve before Judge Peter Port slammed his gavel down on his high desk, "Order, order! No yelling at court!" he yelled, "Mr. Arc, please stop talking to your ward, and make your way to your seat. There shall be no coercion in this hallowed hall!"
Coercion? Ward? What the heck was he talking about?
"Now, Mr. Arc, or I will hold you in contempt!" Port bellowed.
Jaune sighed and did as ordered. Atlesians and their laws. He sat down on his seat and waited until Blake took her spot next to him. She'd gone all out. A full suit and (fake) glasses to add to the professional look. Personally, he had no idea that she studied law, but she wouldn't offer if she didn't, right? Yeah, that made sense.
On the right side of the hall were Weiss and her lawyer Blanche. Their eyes met for a moment before her lips curled up in a thin smile and she turned her nose up at him. Ugh, she really did hate him now, didn't she? Maybe asking to be friends after breaking up with her wasn't a good idea."
"As the 'bereaved party', Weiss was allowed to go first. She made her way to the stand and Jaune was floored when her haughty sneer was immediately replaced by a tearful look that almost put Ruby's puppy dog eyes to shame. If he didn't know better, he would have bought it.
The show started. Her lawyer asked about their relationship and she brought out the whole circus. Tears in her eyes, sniffling against a handkerchief, the works, "Jaune was so forceful," she said in a shaky warble, "Day in and day out, he'd harass me for months. I couldn't leave my room and attend class without worrying that he'd ask me out to the movies or...or..." She shuddered and let out a choked sob, "Serenade me!"
Almost every woman in the audience gasped, "I-I only did that once!" Jaune shouted.
"Silence, Mr. Arc! It is not your turn to speak!" Port bellowed.
"After months of his harassment, I finally gave him a chance. He promised me that he'd do anything to make it work. I told him that I had high standards and he said he'd do anything to meet them." She dabbed at her eyes. Jaune wanted to protest, but a look from Blake made him bite his tongue, "I dedicated my time and effort to help him ensure that we could stand as equals. And then he cruelly ripped my heart out."
Jaune sunk into his seat as Weiss poured her soul out. To hear her tell it, she was the perfect girlfriend while he was a lazy, harassing bastard. He wanted to say something, but Blake kept shushing him and said that if he interrupted one more time he'd be held in contempt of court. So he was forced to just sit there and take it while Weiss besmirched his character.
That wasn't the worst part, though.
"We'd like to call Nora Valkyrie to the stand," Blanche said.
Jaune watched, utterly betrayed, as his sister from another mister walked up to the stand (where did they even get that, he wondered). She at least had the decency to look guilty when their eyes met.
Et tu, Nora?
"Ms. Valkyrie, how would you describe your relationship to Ms. Schnee? And I will remind you that you are under oath."
"Well...she's nice?" Nora squirmed in her seat at the lawyer's expectant look, "Okay, she's really nice. She took me out to all these nice places and we even went to an amusement park. The rollercoaster was so fun!"
"And has Jaune Arc ever done anything like that for you, Ms. Valkyrie?"
"I mean...no, but-"
"No further questions." Blanche cut her off, "As you can see from Ms. Valkyrie's testimony, Ms. Schnee has proven to be a kind, caring, and selfless woman despite all the horrible things her former partner has done to her. She hasn't let this divorce affect how she treats team NPR. Ladies and gentlemen of the court, and of course, Honoroed Judge Port, please take this into account."
"Wh-Why is he talking about this?" Jaune asked Blake nervously.
His representative furrowed her brows together, "Are you serious? This is a divorce, so they're deciding who gets what in the separation. Obviously, the custody of your teammates is included there."
"WHAT?!" Jaune stood stood up.
"Mr. Arc! One more outburst and you will be expelled from the courtroom!" Port slammed down his gavel.
"But-"
"Sit down!" Blake hissed and pulled him back into his chair. He didn't miss the smug, satisfied smirk that Weiss sported, "Do you want to just give up right now? If not, then shut up."
"But-"
"No talking."
...
Jaune sunk back into his seat and watched in complete hopelessness as Ren was called to the stand too. To his credit, he did try to put in a good word for him, but he was forced to admit that he did accept the gifts of fine tea leaves and expensive ingredients that Weiss gave him. The lawyer again used it as proof of Weiss' generosity and how she clearly deserved custody of team NPR in the future.
Pyrrha wasn't called to the stand, but he wasn't surprised there. She was the only one on his team that Weiss couldn't bribe.
"I would like to call Jaune Arc into the stand."
Jaune shuffled over to the spot and felt small with all the glares aimed at him. Weiss had done a good job of presenting him as not just a bad boyfriend but a lacking leader in general.
"I would like to corroborate Ms. Schnee's claims for the record. Did you or did you not spend months attempting to court her? Yes or no?"
"Yeah, but-"
"And did you or did you not stand in front of her door to serenade her with a guitar?"
"It was only once-"
"And then when she rightly closed the door in your face, you stated that you would not sing if she opened it. Upon which you proudly proclaimed that you lied."
"Well, maybe-"
"Maybe? Are you disputing it then?" He snapped his finger and a screen lowered from the ceiling. A video played of him loudly singing that he lied in an off-key tune, "Do you dispute that, Mr. Arc?"
"N-No..."
"Good." He turned back to the audience, "You can see here that Mr. Arc has pushed my client for months, proudly and without shame, despite the strict cultural and legal standards of a relationship. And yet he broke up with her." He said it in the same way someone would talk about a murder, "What this tells us is that Mr. Arc is of questionable moral character. Someone who clearly cannot be trusted with the custody of his team."
"Hey, I resent that!" Jaune snapped.
"I must agree. There shall be no personal attacks on either party's character," Port said.
"Statement retracted." Blanche didn't even turn around, "But I think that the proof speaks for itself, doesn't it? What wrong has my client done to deserve such horrible treatment? And if he is willing to do to someone he spent months courting, what else could he do to his wards?"
"It's not my fault!" Jaune interrupted, "Weiss is...she wanted to put Jaune Junior in a cage!"
He expected support, or at least understanding, but there wasn't a single one. The guys looked apathetic or even jealous while Ren just sighed and shook his head. Was Beacon just filled with masochists?! The only one who looked sympathetic was Pyrrha, who looked away and clenched her hands in pity. Alright, time to bring out the big guns. No way they could justify this.
"A-And she made me try to eat pizza with a spork!"
That got some gasps and whispers, though not nearly enough. Port himself looked somewhat understanding but didn't say anything.
Blanche looked completely unphased by his outburst and just said he had no further questions. Jaune went back to his seat, a man defeated, and Blake clapped his shoulder, "It's our turn." She gave him a confident smile and raised her head high, "We'd like to call Weiss Schnee to the stand!"
Weiss raised a brow but complied. She took her place where he just was and waited as Blake began her questioning.
"Ms. Schnee, your company has come under fire for your controversial labor practices. Many Faunus under the SDC's employ have suffered from numerous offenses such as low wages, a lack of hazard pay, and working in unsafe conditions. Just yesterday I heard that-"
"I'm sorry, what does this have to do with the current proceedings?" Weiss asked.
"Downplaying and deflecting. This is a bad sign."
"Blake!" Jaune stood up again, "You're supposed to be defending me here!"
"What? Are you saying that your divorce is more important than the plight of the Faunus?" Blake rounded on him, eyes narrowed, "That's so selfish! No wonder Weiss broke up with you."
"I broke up with her!"
"We would officially like that kept on the record. Jaune Arc shows absolutely no shame in breaking my client's heart," Blanche said.
"But- you- this this isn't-"
"Ms. Belladonna, please focus on the case at hand." Port's mustache bristled, "Your defense for Mr. Arc?"
"Huh? Oh, I don't have one." Jaune slammed his head on the table, "Who cares about a single divorce compared to the fate of all the Faunus? I just needed to get Weiss on the stand."
...
"This trial is over. Ms. Schnee's demands shall be honored. Mr. Arc, you are hereby stripped of custody of your team, your armor, your color palette, and your name. Henceforth you are now known as Juan Arco." Jaune's mouth gaped, "You will also be required to give her half of your weekly stipend as alimony. Out of respect for being forced to use a spork, you shall be allowed to keep your sword. The court is adjourned!"
"What?!" Juan shouted, "But that's...that's not fair!"
"Bear the consequences of your actions, Juan." Weiss' smile was all teeth, "Don't worry, I'll let you have team WNPR every other month. Until then, please stay in your lane or I'll have to file a restraining order."
"But..."
Weiss kept smiling as she walked away, looking like the cat that ate the canary. "Oh well, I did my best." Blake sighed as she sat next to him.
"...I hate you so much right now."
"I'm not the one who dated the crazy Atlesian heiress." Blake scoffed, "And of course no one cares about the Faunus. Racism wins again."
He was too tired to say anything or stop Blake from leaving. Jaun leaned back on his seat and stared up at the ceiling blankly as the crowds shuffled. Finally, it was just him and Ren. His former(?) teammate sat next to him and sighed. Neither of them said a word, content with just letting the absurd situation sink in.
"I warned you not to go after her." Ren sighed. Juan didn't say anything, "I warned you and you didn't listen. Now I'm the child of a broken home."
"You're not my kid!"
"No, but does that really matter right now? As far as the law is concerned, Weiss is now the not-mother to our entire team. You blew it, Juan."
Juan didn't reply and just sat there as Ren left and he was finally alone.
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Two weeks passed and the divorce had already left everyone's mind. Juan wished he could say the same, but it was hard to ignore considering everything.
He'd lost it all. Weiss took his armor, his name, and his team. He didn't even sleep in the same dorm room anymore. The school was forced to provide him a new place because, by law, he wasn't allowed to be near team JNPR - now team WNPR (Winner, just to rub salt in the wound) - before his allotted weekends. The weekends being the two days every couple of months he was allowed to spend time with his friends.
Juan Arco was a man defeated. Even now, his very existence was a living reminder of Weiss' vengeance. White, black, and blue were forbidden colors on him now so he was forced to spend whatever was left of his stipend on new clothes. All the while, Weiss continued to flaunt everything she'd won over him.
Case in point.
"Nora, you must eat your vegetables," Weiss said. She and the rest of team WNPR were sitting a few tables down to his left. Team RBY had (wisely) chosen to keep their distance after the court proceedings.
"But I don't wanna~!" Nora whined, pouting up at the (slightly) taller girl.
"We all must do things that we don't like, dear." Weiss sighed, "I am your not-mother, and you have to listen to me. So...eat your vegetables. Please."
Nora wailed like a wounded puppy but was ultimately forced to obey. Weiss was right; she was her not-mom and she had to do what she said. As it turned out, being the fun not mom only lasted up until the divorce was finalized. Now that she didn't have to bribe her not children to look good for the courts, she was free to be as strict and demanding as she wanted to be. Juan wished he could say that he was satisfied with it coming back to bite Nora after her betrayal, but he was too miserable to care.
"And Ren, I heard you did very well in last week's midterms. Very good. Pyrrha, on the other hand..." Weiss clicked her tongue, "I understand that the divorce proceedings were difficult, but that's not an excuse to let your grades slip. I expect better in the upcoming quizzes or I'll have to ground you."
"Y-You can't do that!"
"I very much can." Weiss raised a brow in challenge, "You are my not-children, and I'll treat you all equally. You might be a champion fighter, but that does not excuse lacking grades. Please make sure to shape up, dear. I don't want to have to punish you."
"This is crazy!" Pyrrha looked to Ren and Nora desperately, "Weiss is the same age as us and has no blood relation! How is this legal?!"
"The laws of man are unfair, Pyrrha," Ren said, the very picture of serenity. Or apathy. It was one of the two.
"Quite." Weiss sipped her tea, "Now, do remember that we will be visiting you not-family this weekend. Winter and Whitley are your not-aunt and not-uncle and they're very eager to meet you. I suppose I must also introduce you three to mother and father as their not-grandchildren, though I have my doubts that they'll care overly much. They can barely stomach being around one another, let alone anyone else."
"None of this makes sense!" Pyrrha cried.
Juan looked down at his tray and grit his teeth. No, he wasn't going to let it end like this. He wasn't crazy enough to say he was blameless in this whole thing, but Weiss had gone too far! He slammed his hands on the table and stood up. Weiss looked his way and he glared. She wasn't intimidated in the least and sneered back. He'd wipe that look off her face if it was the last thing he did.
It took him weeks of non-stop searching before he found his lifeline. Men down in Vale spoke of him in hushed whispers and awed retellings. The Man in the Clocktower. A man who could overturn any divorce no matter how unfavorable the odds or how long the ruling had passed. And he did it all at no cost. All one had to do was bow their head and accept his terms.
Which was how he found himself here on his hands and knees with his head bowed in front of the headmaster of Beacon Academy. Ozpin paid him no mind and continued to look at the setting sun outside of the large office window, "You must be desperate to come to me." Ozpin sipped his hot chocolate without a sound, "You know that there's a price one must pay, especially of someone in your position."
"I-I'll do it! I'll do anything! Anything to wipe that look off her face!" Juan shouted, face still pressed against the floor.
"That anger...I know it well." Another sip and he finally turned around, "I can give you your life back, Mr. Arco, and this time, I won't exact a price for myself. I think the results will be enough of a price in and of itself."
"Th...Thank you..."
"You might not thank me when it's all said and done."
Ozpin called up another trial with himself as the representative. The look of anger on Weiss' face was glorious, but it was quickly replaced by smug satisfaction. What could he do, her eyes seemed to say. She'd already won, how could even the headmaster of Beacon expect to scrape together a victory?
And yet he had. Ozpin methodically overturned each and every single one of Weiss' demands and brought up subclauses or archaic (but still technically enforable) laws to win the arguments. Most of the legal jargon sailed right over Jaune's head, but he knew that Blanche was helpless before him. Weiss had gone from smug assurance to desperate rage as she realized that she wouldn't win this fight.
By the end of it all, Blanche was slumped over the desk in defeat while Weiss looked like her head was going to explode. Port rubbed his mustache in contemplation as Ozpin sat next to him again, "Well...I think we've reached our conclusion. From henceforth, Jaune Arc and Weiss Schnee are now officially married in the eyes of both Valean and Atlesian law. For now and beyond death."
...
Wait, what?
"Huh?" Jaune looked to Ozpin, "Wait, what's going on?"
"Your victory." Ozpin tapped his cane on the ground, "There was no way for you to regain everything you'd lost after your last defeat. You told me that you would do anything to 'wipe that look off her face'. Well, it's done. You and Weiss are married. Forever. You know how the vows say till death do you part? Well, forget that. Death won't be enough to separate this marriage. You can never divorce one another again. Your bond is eternal."
"What?!" Jaune shouted.
"What?!" Weiss shouted louder. She stood up and marched over to the headmaster, all respect for an authority figure forgotten, "You can't do this! You must've broken some law or-or done something illegal!"
"Oh? Check the laws, Ms. Schnee. Every single thing I said was written and still binding to this day. I should know."
"But...you can't..." Weiss muttered weakly.
"I very well can. You thought your fancy Atlesian lawyers could defeat me? Ms. Schnee, I created the very concept of divorce. There is nothing you or anyone can do to stop me." He smiled and looked at Jaune, "Enjoy your victory, Mr. Arc, bittersweet as it may be. Remember to take pleasure in the little things."
Jaune didn't know what to say to that. So, he said nothing. Now that they were married under two kingdoms' laws, they had to wear rings and share a room. Jaune felt like a noose was being tightened around his neck as Weiss slipped the ring into his finger. The only relief was that he knew she felt the same.
At least he got all his stuff back.
Their first night as a married couple was about as awkward as could be expected. The two of them lay stock still on the bed and stared up at the ceiling without a single word said between the pair. He was utterly miserable, and yet so was Weiss; possibly even more than him given how she'd utterly failed and had her victory upturned by someone she thought she'd beaten.
Seeing the bitterness on her face made it feel all worth it in the end. Maybe that's why couples who hated each other stuck around. The fleeting joy of getting to ruin their partner's day.
"I hate you," Weiss said.
"I hate you too." Jaune smiled.
"You ruined everything."
"Keep talking like that. It only makes me happier."
"...Asshole." Weiss turned away and curled in on herself.
Jaune sighed. Ozpin was right. These little moments of victory were amazing.
...
Well, that and hate sex. Since they figured that they couldn't go for anyone else anymore, they might as well make do with each other. Turned out? Felt amazing. They got to scream about how much they hated each other while getting their rocks off. It was the closest thing to a happy marriage either of them could get.
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Less bitter ending for Jaune. In the last one, Blake pretty much won and Jaune gets all the egg on his face. Now at least they're both miserable and Jaune gets to have some hate sex.
Not sure who the next person will be. Maybe Pyrrha or Nora. We'll see.
Patreon Question:
1. Would you guys be interested in a smut of the White Knight hate sex idea posited at the end of this chapter? It might be fun since I usually do femdom focused works given my commissions. Just the two sniping and insulting one another during sex might be funny.
Comments
pilot puntastic
This was an interesting beast to read. The beginning was very funny with Weiss' strange fancy ways being almost alien to Jaune was a great way to highlight how different they were, though I feel it could have been expanded beyond food. Maybe on how someone like Weiss and now Jaune have to be on top of their public image and how it's imperative Jaune hires an image consultant ASAP. The middle was a bit hard to read. Quickly jumping from a steamy scene to a bitter divorce where Juan lost everything. The middle was incredibly bitter and while I was not the biggest fan it does lean into the hate part of the hate sex very well. Also Worst Girl Blake cameo! Honestly her part could have been a bit better if her fool proof iron clad defense was "Weiss is a Schnee therefore who wouldn't want to divorce her after what her family did to the Faunus?" Team JNPR's reactions were very fun. Nora and Ren being so willing to jump ship was funny but Weiss proceeding to Not-Mother them afterwards was hilarious. Pyrrha was a real stand out this chapter. Sure in the beginning it was because of her crush on Jaune but near the end she was practically the only voice of reason in a world almost empty of it. I am surprised she didn't try to solve the problem the same way she won her tournaments. By slamming her shield into her opponent's face in a completely legal way. Ozpin inventing divorce is interesting. My conspiracy theory is that he invented divorce with all these loopholes and marriage after death clauses to trap Salem. Say she summons the Brother gods, if Ozpin can convince them that a legal battle between him and Salem would be more interesting to them than just incinerating the planet. He could trap Salem in an eternal marriage. For the first that would be cool to see. Maybe the arguments could start off hateful and biting but as they get into it they could devolve into just hurling insults as they bang like in the last bit of the chapter.
nemo1986
Sure. Sounds like fun.
