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Pilot Puntastic - Cosplay Shenanigans
🕑 Added 2023-12-31 16:09:11 +0000 UTCHappy New Years! Finished this literally a minute before 2024 hit. This is a gift for Pilot Puntastic, one of my longest supporters. Just a small 2k thing about some slice of life shenanigans.
Next one will be for Ale Scitan and it'll be a chapter 2 for the 'Arkos adopts Cinder' fic. If you're reading this, sorry it took so long.
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The life of a Huntsman was a glorious one. Adventure, fighting, and exploring the world. It was like one big party. And then when you had to retire? Well, you'd have a fortune to live off of from all the missions, assuming you didn't wanna do something like become an informal teacher for the next generation or settle down in a village somewhere to be the local protector and celebrity.
Yeah, the life of a Huntsman was a great one.
The life of a Huntsman student, on the other hand? Not so much. Or Huntress student, in Yang's case. Yeah, she was a badass who kicked ass, took names, and helped save the city once or twice, but did she get anything out of it? Nope. Sure, it was nice helping people and all, but repairs for bumblebee were expensive and she couldn't even get a discount from Mick for saving his shop from being a crater. That wasn't even counting all the stuff she could've used money on like new drinks, clothes, and (especially) her personal hair care products. This blonde mane wasn't cheap to maintain.
So of course she got an idea when she saw that poster while she was walking around town. A cosplay competition for groups of four taking place tomorrow. Not her kind of thing - Blake was the one who was into all that cosplay stuff - but her eyes were drawn to the prize. 10,000 lien for the first place winners. Even split four ways, 2,500 was nothing to sneeze at. She could get a lot of stuff with that kind of dough. Bumblebee could get the TLC she deserved.
The theme even worked out. Legendary Huntsmen teams. Who better to cosplay as a Huntress than one of the most badass ones in training? And she had the perfect people to copy. Team STRQ. Or, as she liked to call them, Mom, Dad, Raven, and Uncle Qrow. Being the kid of Vale's premier Huntsmen team for this generation meant she had a lot to live up to, so she was absolutely down to use it to her advantage.
Convincing Ruby to join her was easy enough. Her little sis always did like dressing up in costume, and she was the one teenager who thought that dressing up as your mom wasn't cringy or embarassing. Yang could get Raven's look easily enough. Just had to get some hair dye she was sure wouldn't damage her golden locks. It'd be expensive, but she'd consider it an investment for a good cause.
The problem came with the other half of the team. As cool as Weiss and Blake were, they couldn't exactly pass themselves off as dudes - even if Weiss did have the chest for it.
Elsewhere, Weiss suddenly felt the urge to kick Yang's butt tomorrow.
So, Yang had to get creative.
"Ren, Jaune! Buddies!" Jaune grinned as she stepped inside team JNPR's dorm. She knew the two would've been without their partners. Nora was off being Nora while Pyrrha was off doing something with the headmaster cause of something she did during the Vytal tournament. Something about that Cinder transfer student. Cause nothing bad ever happened. EVER.
"O-Oh! Hey, Yang." Jaune smiled nervously while Ren nodded. Vomit Boy had good reason to be nervous. Yang was a woman who often found herself bored and VB was one of her favorite victi- pals. One of her favorite pals. He reminder her of Ruby. Except he was tall, blonde, scraggly, could barely use a weapon, and...actually, they didn't have a lot in common except liking comic books and being blind to how their partners felt about them.
"Gentlemen, I have a proposition for you both." She rubbed her hands together, grin widening, "How does 2,500 lien each sound to you both?"
Ren and Jaune looked at one another then back at her before Ren spoke up, "I would ask what the catch is. None of us are exactly swimming in lien and I doubt you'd be so generous."
"Rude!" Yang huffed, "Alright, so here's the deal..."
Convincing them was a bit harder than Rubes, but the thought of money was enough for them to see the benefits. How many comic books and ingredients for health drinks could they buy with 2,500 each?
Now all that was left was finding the right costumes. And thankfully for her, she had the perfect source.
Raiding your parents' closet for clothes wasn't something any self-respecting teenager would do, especially not someone was cool as her, but desperate times called for desperate measures. She made sure to do it when Mom and Dad were out. The last thing she needed was for them to start asking questions. Or worse, think that she wanted their aadvice on fashion! She loved Dad and everything, but a vest over a button-up shirt and cargo shorts? It was a miracle he managed to land Mom and Raven with the way he dressed.
She felt a bit odd raiding her Raven's closest. Raven and Dad divorced just a couple of years into their marriage. She was always focused on being a Huntsman and apparently domestic life didn't suit her. Yang didn't hate her for it or anything. She still made sure to stick around Vale just in case and, while she wasn't exactly a good mom, she was a hell of a teacher. She and Uncle Qrow had that in common.
Just...why did her Huntress gear have to include a miniskirt? She was pushing 40, for Brothers' sake. Then there were those meatheads who talked about how she was a MILF. Ugh. Just remembering it made her shudder.
Oh well, at least she could pull it off, even if she'd make damn sure no one in her family besides Ruby would ever find out what happened.
Thankfully, she didn't have to worry about being caught. Dad said all four of them had to go do a publicity thing as team STRQ. Probably go off to somewhere like Haven and give a speech about what being a Huntsman meant. She didn't ask. All she knew was that they'd be out for the day, which would give her enough time to get this over with and earn that prize money.
"Oh, I'm so excited!" Ruby squealed as soon as they arrived. Admittedly, it wasn't really a big change for her. She'd swapped out her red cloak for a white one, true, but she and Mom shared a style anyway. Ruby was pretty much a little clone of mom, which was kind of creepy, if she was being honest. Yang at least had to dye her hair to make sure she looked more like Raven did.
Jaune pulled it off too. Sure, he didn't have the muscles or tan Dad had, but it was a close enough approximation. That and Dad was never one for the fancy duds the Mom, Raven, and Uncle Qrow wore, though personally, Yang thought that was just him being a cheapskate.
The biggest surprise was Ren. He'd waived off Yang's offer of a wig and actually cut his long ponytail off. Yang felt super bad about that, but he'd said that it was time anyway and he figured that a change wouldn't be bad. Some hair gel and a change of clothes later and the guy was practically unrecognizable save the pink streak in his hair, which he'd refused to dye. Yang didn't even ask. She could tell it was special.
She did make sure to take a picture while he wasn't looking, though. Nora would love it.
Yang looked around the convention. Places like this weren't her jam, but she couldn't deny that she could see why it appealed to some people. And maybe she liked the idea that someday these people would be dressing up like her instead. You would've thought saving the city after the White Fang rammed a train to let Grimm in would be enough, but no, apparently not. All that got them was a fancy banquet that was just an excuse for the rich people to throw their money around.
"Wow..." Jaune muttered to her left.
"Indeed." Ren nodded after.
"Yeah, yeah, it's impressive, but remember why we're here." Yang clapped her hands, "Eyes on the prize, lady and gents." She thought of something that would piss her off so her eyes turned red. Might as well be as accurate as she could be.
They hung around the place after registering in the competition. While everyone else was excited about the con, Yang was focused on exactly what she'd get once they won the prize. Bumblebee and her hair came first, of course, but there were some outfits she wanted to get and a few nights of clubbing she deserved after working so hard. Maybe a console too, but she had the feeling that Ruby would buy that.
Finally, the competition started. It was pretty simple - go up on stage and strut their stuff for the crowd and judges. Nothing to it. Yang would've been lying if she said she didn't lap up their looks and applause, though the fact that she was cosplaying as her mom kinda ruined it.
"And the winner is...group 9 cosplaying as team STRQ! Congratulations!" Yang smirked while Ruby, Jaune, and even Ren cheered. She rubbed her hands together; she could already feel the money in her palms, "And to give them their cash prize, we have some special guests: give it up for the actual team STRQ, ladies and gentlemen!"
...
What?
Yang froze like a deer in the headlights as Mom, Dad, Raven, and Uncle Qrow stepped onto the stage. Her small hope that they didn't recognize her died when she saw the looks on their faces. Mom looked at them with a proud, beaming smile filled with love and adoration. Dad looked pleasantly surprised and rubbed his chin. Uncle Qrow had a shit-eating grin on his face and took a swig of his flask.
The worst was Raven. She didn't laugh or smile or anything. No, it wa so much worse. She raised a brow as soon as she saw her and then smirked. The single gesture was worth a thousand words and Yang felt like melting to the floor in the hope that maybe she could just die right here and now.
"Come on up here, team 9, and get your prize!" the announcer said.
It would've been one thing if they were all embarassed, but she had to bear the shame all on her own. Jaune and Ren had nothing to be ashamed of. After all, they didn't really know who the four of them were outside of them being ther friends' family. Meanwhile, Ruby was the kind of person to think dressing up like her Mom was cool, so she was loud and proud as she strutted up on the stage.
Which left Yang having to shuffle on stage like a wallflower behind the rest of them. It would've been almost okay if they just ignored her, but of course they didn't. Mom wouldn't stop taking pictures and gushing about how adorable they all looked while Dad was chuckling proudly about how much they must've admired team STRQ to do this. Uncle Qrow didn't say anything, but the look in his eyes was enough.
And then there was Raven.
"Congratulations, team 9," she said, voice sickeningly sweet. She held out a small trophy along with the stack of hundreds, "You're clearly the best in the show. Especially you." She looked right at Yang as she said that.
"...Thanks." Yang forced a smile on her face as she accepted the prize. The crowd cheered and took photos while Yang died inside. Ugh, this couldn't get any worse.
Out of nowhere, Weiss suddenly came up behind her and kicked her hard enough to launch her into the air.
"That's for yesterday, Xiao Long!"
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Yes, I ended on a Spongebob joke. Don't ask me why, I don't know either.
Ah well. Here's to a nother year of fics!
Comments
pilot puntastic
Yang going from absolutely pumped about the competition to absolutely mortified is just hilarious. I honestly can't tell if Nora would be mad or not, on the one hand Ren's long flowing hair is gone but on the other he now has short rogue-ish hair that's new and exciting. To be fair to Ruby at least Summer has a different hair style, it's not super different but it does differ them a little bit. The real stand out among Team STRQ has to be Raven. True she didn't stick around for the diapers and scraped knees but she did take Yang under her wing, metaphorically not literally unless Ozpin's bird magic is genetic. The way she did the bare minimum in teasing but still got maximum damage shows that Yang still has a lot to learn in the art of teasing. The Weiss moment at the end was the cherry on top of a fantastic story, thanks for writing it. Happy new years!
Moonkiller24
Cute. Happy new year christian boies and gals!
Joshua Hunt
Heh! Cute and snappy. Happy New year!
