Kristoffer Pauly
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MADMAN APOCALYPSE - Book 3 - Chapter 22
🕑 Added 2025-07-11 00:35:34 +0000 UTC-Previous chapter-
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Chapter 22
With our combined strength, the three of us were able to get the Humanbus back upright. As soon as it was back on its many feet, a door opened in the side of its head, and we all got back on board.
No sooner had we entered than the bus took off, opening holes in the walls and ceiling for us to get back into our turrets.
[THE FUZZ IS ON OUR TAIL, WE GOTTA SKEDADDLE!]
I climbed into the same flesh pod as before, finding my ballista once again aiming towards the shops on the side of the street. More of the frogs were coming in hot, but the Humanbus picked up speed immediately, leaving our pursuers in the dust.
In the distance behind us came a loud roaring buzz, like that of a jetliner flying overhead.
Then I saw it.
It was a large four-winged ship with a long tapering body and the front of which was like an enormous head. It was shaped like a dragonfly but was as big as the Metro Train, if not bigger.
“Gambit, that’s not a ship,” Panda said. “That is the Dragonfly Defender.”
“Why is it so fucking enormous!?” I exclaimed, firing a shot off at a frog that’d gotten close and skewering it to a billboard.
“They fight Voidspawn,” Panda replied, as though that explained everything.
Although I supposed that maybe it did, given that some of the Voidspawn we’d encountered had been the size of moons. By that measurement, the Dragonfly might even be undersized.
“It’s not gonna chase us, is it?”
Panda shrugged. “Let’s hope not.”
I nailed another frog mid-leap and sent it spinning. Then the Humanbus jumped around a corner, startling a group of Players nearby before thundering ahead.
“How long do we have left of this Safe Zone event?” I asked.
“Like 3 more minutes,” Panda replied.
I was glad it wasn’t as long as the mall event had been, but I guessed the tradeoff was that the mobile Safe Zone would be way less spacious. Hopefully it would still give us access to vendors and such.
“What’s the deal with Tina? Do you know what’s up with her?” I asked, hoping she couldn’t hear me.
“I’ve seen it before,” Panda replied, surprising me. “It’s like she’s undertaking a challenge run. I think you should give her the Foie Gras you have, she’ll need to collect seven of those.”
“A challenge run?” I asked, but Panda was suddenly gone.
Then Tina’s status screen hit me.
[Status x ]
Level 1 — ‘Tina & Nina’ — Swanling
INSANITY GAUGE: 100%
STATS
Health: 20 — Stamina: 30
Armor: 12 — Carry Weight: 200
Top Speed: 13.5 km/h — Mana: 4
ATTRIBUTES
Strength: 10 — Dexterity: 4
Intelligence: 2 — Vitality: 10
Athleticism: 4 — Perception: 2
Wisdom: 2 — Defense: 6
ABILITIES
Reckless Charge
PASSIVES
Inanimate Voices
Insanity
Menacing Aura
Territorial Dominance
Her attributes looked really strong for a level 1, but I guessed there had to be some demerit if it was meant to be a ‘challenge run’ like Panda had said.
I looked through the skills to find the answer.
[‘Reckless Charge’ x ]
Ability
This is the kind of power I can get behind.
Who cares about planning and self-preservation when you can just throw your body directly at a problem.
Many of the Players in the country of Spain are dealing with enraged bulls that have this kind of mindset, and it’s not working out well for the Players.
Those bulls look tasty though.
I might have to go pay them a visit.
Instantly accelerate from 0 to 60 in a chosen direction until you collide with something or have traveled 100 feet. Collision damage gains a 5x impact bonus while active.
Deals double damage and goes twice as fast while flapping your wings.
Cooldown: 5 minutes
[‘Menacing Aura’ x ]
Passive
Swans are one of those animals that gain a +100 point boost to their natural intimidation.
Now so do you, little Swanling.
People become less inclined to attack you, especially if you have wings.
[‘Territorial Dominance’ x ]
Passive
Status: Active
Territory: Serenity Park
Swans are territorial creatures known to go up against monsters twice their size just to defend what they deem to be theirs.
But defending your homebase from intruders is an onerous task.
While your territory is clear of invaders, you gain a +5 boost to your Strength and Vitality Attributes.
Defeating World Boss Swans will add their territory to your collection and increase the Attribute boost.
All Swans within your current Region are naturally drawn to your territory.
Panda reappeared on my shoulder.
“Tina says she’ll trade you for the Swan Foie Gras,” he said.
“Her powers look pretty strong,” I commented.
“She has to constantly protect her territory though,” Panda said. “And there’s the whole becoming a magnet to other swans. It’s not so big a problem now, since I think there’s only one swan per region at the moment. However, once we complete the second Great Game Event, then the Regions expand.”
“So she might be strong now, but she’ll end up having to constantly defend Serenity Park… I don’t know, that doesn’t seem that bad.”
“She can only evolve if she fights other swans for their Foie Gras, so I think the challenge lies in finding a way to defend her territory and traveling far to seek out other World Bosses. I don’t know how many are in the United States, but she might have to go abroad to fulfill her task. And the swans will just get stronger and stronger as time passes.”
“I see,” was all I replied as I turned my focus back to the defense of the Humanbus
I shot a frog in the leg, pinning it to a randomly-placed tree on the street, but another two were right behind it and I couldn’t reload fast enough to get them in time.
A bolt skipped off the top of a lamppost and then skimmed along the roof the frogs were on, tearing through both of them with terrifying precision.
“Nice shot!” I yelled.
“I don’t have any more things to kill back here!” Bee shouted back from the rear of the bus, sounding disappointed.
Suddenly my flesh pod pulled me back into the bus, setting me down on a seat. On the other side Tina was placed back inside as well, and a moment later Bee ran up to me, her purple soul wing glittering with excitement.
“Did we do it!?” she asked.
Her answer came in the form of a System message.
WORLD FIRST ANNOUNCEMENT!
Player ‘Gambit’ is the first person to establish a Safe Zone in the GREAT GAME!
ERROR
Could not retrieve additional announcement info!
“What the hell?” I muttered.
“Great, you broke it already,” Panda deadpanned.
A blue glow rolled across the interior of the Humanbus, and I received an achievement.
[Congratulations! You have unlocked an achievement! x ]
‘World First Safe Zoner’
Created the first Safe Zone in the GREAT GAME.
I’m supposed to berate you for creating a Safe Zone before it’s even possible.
Apparently, they had not loaded up the announcement information yet, so that’s why it bugged out.
Speaking of bugs, I hopped over to the Accounting Department and tried out one of the caterpillars that work there.
I wasn’t really a big fan of the taste and now my teleportation power has been confiscated.
The big bossman doesn’t seem to mind though, so I’m sure I’ll get it back.
Anyway, since you’re the first to make a Safe Zone, you get a special reward on top of the standard stuff.
Although, I have to inform you that your level up is locked until after the next GAME Event, since you’re already level -20.
Rewards: +1 Level, 100x ‘GAME Coins’, & ‘Key to the City (Castleburg)’
[‘Key to the City (Castleburg)’ x ]
Item
Rewarded to ‘Gambit’ for establishing the first Safe Zone in his Region.
By squeezing the key tightly, the wielder can teleport to any place within their Region.
Uses remaining: 3/3
Weight: Approximately one
“That’s the same key that Samantha got last time,” Bee said as the large golden key appeared in my hands.
“Huh, I didn’t get the MVP this time,” I said.
“Well, Bee did most of the work,” Panda replied.
“Wait a minute…” I said suspiciously. “I never got to see what the MVP trophy did from the last dimension.”
Panda blinked. “Huh, you’re right. Where did that trophy go? I don’t remember seeing it in your inventory.”
“What the fuck!” I exclaimed. “I got scammed!”
“So that’s why I got two of them,” Bee commented. “I was really confused for a second.”
She handed me a small trophy shaped like me, but from how I’d looked back in the previous dimension when I’d cleared the Safe Zone event with Samantha and Bee. She was holding one that was sculpted to look like her current self. Both of the trophies had a small round stand with a plaque that read, ‘You’re the best!’
“How the hell did you lose that?” Panda wondered.
“I didn’t lose shit!” I replied. “It clearly just vanished from my inventory!”
I inspected the trophy, wondering if its description would hold any clues.
[‘Safe Zone MVP Trophy’ x ]
Item
Rewarded to ‘Gambit’ for [REDACTED]
You won’t believe where I found this thing.
That’s right, in the Accounting Department!
It was standing on someone’s desk next to a picture of his family.
So anyway, I ate him and brought this back for you.
Funny timing, right?
But yeah, apparently the Accounting Department is one of the few agencies that ignore dimensional magic, probably because they have to be on top of all the taxes and such.
It is, unfortunately, no longer a functional reward.
Due to dimensional dissonance, this item has no effect.
Weight: Approximately one
“Are you fucking kidding me,” I grumbled.
“I got a new amazing ability!” Bee exclaimed.
I sighed.
“Humanbus, take us to the nearest bottomless hole,” I said.
[AYE AYE!]
“Gambit, no!” Panda yelled.
The Humanbus started picking up speed.
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So, yeah, I did honestly forget about the Safe Zone MVP Trophy from the end of book 1...
Anyway! It's clearly canon that the Great Game agencies are bad at their jobs.
Couldn't be me.
Couldn't be me...
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Comments
the ice man
I think he's throwing a tantrum by refusing to use his skills because he was covered in bus brain goop, if I guess
Throh_goblin Lord
I miss Brock, what happened to my lil guy of varying accents
Jeanean
Hey, if you hadn't said anything I would not even have suspected a mistake on the authors part... And thats what makes this story so fun XD
