Fable Weaver
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DOS Ch-185
🕑 Added 2025-03-02 17:36:09 +0000 UTC“Thank you for coming to the show,” Jonathan Ross greeted me politely. “You’re our second-youngest guest ever. The youngest was this guy called Troy Armitage, a few years ago.”
I chuckled at his lame joke before replying, “That’s my greatest achievement to date—being the youngest guest on this talk show.”
“Speaking of achievements, congratulations on your Oscar wins earlier this year. How did it feel when you found out you’d tied with Walt Disney for the most Oscars in different categories? Did you expect that outcome?”
I smiled at the question, knowing this was the easier part of the interview.
“No,” I admitted. “I had my second Oscar in the bag, but I never expected to win anything else. Why would they give me another one so soon? That’s what I thought before the ceremony. No one was more shocked than me when it happened.”
Jonathan leaned forward, his expression shifting as he posed the first tough question of the night. “Some people—industry experts and prominent critics—have argued that [The Perks of Being a Wallflower] won Best Picture only because Academy members were too homophobic to give the award to [Brokeback Mountain]. What’s your take on that?”
I had been given a list of questions in advance by his team. Some were a bit controversial, but after reading through them, I agreed to answer them all—I knew people wanted to hear my thoughts. However, I had set one condition: I could veto anything from airing later if I chose. They had agreed, and now I had the difficult job of answering this without coming across as an entitled, smug asshole—like George Clooney during his Oscar speech.
“I think it’s pointless to argue over award shows with ‘could haves’ or ‘should haves,’” I began calmly. “I don’t know which film should have won. I’ve watched [Brokeback Mountain], and it’s a great movie, but you can’t deny its rewatchability isn’t the best. I mean, if I had to choose between watching [Brokeback] or [Perks] again, I’d pick the latter any day. And not just because it’s my film.”
Jonathan leaned back, looking ready to counter, when another thought struck me.
“Also, let’s not forget that [Perks] has three major characters, and one of them is gay. So I don’t know how homophobic they’re making the Academy out to be. And if people still aren’t convinced, I have just one thing to say.”
Turning toward the camera, I looked straight into the lens and said in a deadpan, “Get a life. It’s just an award that’ll mean nothing after a few years.”
The studio audience erupted in laughter and applause. I grinned at their reaction before turning to Jonathan, silently prompting him to move on.
“So, you’re turning 18 in a few months,” Jonathan continued. “Are you looking forward to that? Ready to dive into all the boozing and clubbing that young people do?”
“Not really,” I shrugged. “I don’t get the appeal of alcohol at all. Why would I willingly drink something that makes you reckless, impairs your judgment, is addictive, doesn’t even taste great the first time, and is bad for your health?”
Jonathan gave me a strange look before quipping, “You must be fun at parties!”
The audience chuckled at his jab.
The real reason I avoided alcohol had nothing to do with fun—it was because of my biological mother. Alcohol had destroyed her life, and indirectly, it had left deep scars on mine. To this day, I hadn’t forgiven her for what she put me through. I couldn’t risk letting history repeat itself with me.
“I don’t need a drink to enjoy a party,” I pointed out.
“Fair enough,” Jonathan conceded before shifting gears. “You had a very public relationship with Rihanna until just a few days ago. The news shocked your fans worldwide—including me. What happened?”
I really didn’t want to talk about it. But I knew I had to. Someone was bound to ask eventually, especially with this press junket in full swing, so I’d rather set the record straight on my own terms.
“I loved Rihanna,” I began. “Scratch that—I still love her. She’s the most beautiful person I’ve had the privilege of knowing, inside and out. When we first met, we had this instant connection—we both felt it. From that moment, things moved so fast we didn’t stop to think about the logistics if we were to get together.”
“Logistics?” Jonathan asked, intrigued.
“She’s based in L.A. most of the time,” I explained. “I’m here in London unless I’m off filming somewhere. She’s just getting started in her career, and I don’t want her to put that on hold to come live here in London.”
Jonathan gave me a sympathetic nod. “That must be tough.”
“It is,” I admitted. “But the decision was mutual—no hard feelings on either side. It’s just… still a little difficult to talk about.”
“Then let’s not dwell on it,” Jonathan said, true to his word. He smoothly pivoted to another topic. “I actually have a serious complaint for you—from a very dedicated fan.”
“Oh?” I asked, curious.
“My niece, Lori,” he revealed. “She’s 13, and she wanted me to ask why you haven’t held any concerts in London when this is your home.”
I laughed at that, immediately forgetting the somber mood the last question had set for me. “I want to, I really do. I just haven’t had the time.”
Then, after a brief pause, I made up my mind.
“You know what? I’m tied up in L.A. for a few more months, but after that, I’ll be back home—hopefully by January or February. I’ll try to arrange at least one concert in London.”
The audience went crazy at my announcement, as if I had just revealed the exact concert dates.
“Just one?” Jonathan asked once the cheers died down. “You committed to twelve in L.A.”
“At least one,” I corrected. “It depends on my schedule. I don’t want to hype up people’s expectations prematurely with a promise I couldn’t keep.”
We chatted a bit more, keeping it light, before Jonathan steered the conversation toward the real reason I was here.
“You have a Harry Potter film coming out this week, and it’s already receiving rave reviews from critics worldwide. Care to talk about that?”
“Definitely,” I grinned. “It’s the fifth movie in the series, [Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix]. After the events of the fourth film, the Ministry of Magic is in denial about Voldemort’s return, so they start a smear campaign against my character. This one has everything—twists and turns, flying sequences, magical duels, riding on flying beasts, and way more magic than before. Honestly, it’s my favorite movie in the series so far. Our director, Rian Johnson, did an incredible job with it.”
“Wow,” Jonathan said, clearly excited. “I’ve seen the first four films, and I was already eager for this one. But after that description? I can’t wait for the weekend.” He turned to the audience and announced, “[Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix] hits cinemas this weekend. Get your tickets now before they’re all gone—like most of this young man’s films!”
Then he turned back to me and extended a hand. “Congratulations on your film. And thank you so much for being here.”
I shook his hand as the audience erupted into generous applause once more.
As soon as the cameras cut off, Jonathan’s smile relaxed into something more natural.
“It’s great having you here,” he said. “Not just saying that for the cameras—you genuinely boost my ratings.”
I inclined my head. “Glad to be of help.”
He hesitated for a moment before asking, “I didn’t want to bring it up on air, but… are you okay? You look like you’ve lost quite a bit of weight.”
“Oh!” I chuckled. “Don’t worry, I’m intentionally dropping some muscle mass for a new project. I’m actually glad it’s noticeable now.”
“It is,” he said. “Though, I have to admit—I preferred you all buff and muscly. You’ve been an inspiration for a lot of people, including me.”
He gestured to himself. “I saw an interview of yours two years ago where you talked about your workout routine, and I thought, ‘If this kid can do it, why can’t I?’ Since then, I’ve lost forty pounds and can now bench 250.”
“Woah! That’s amazing, man!” I said, genuinely impressed. “I had no idea I influenced you like that.”
Now that he mentioned it, Jonathan did look noticeably slimmer and healthier compared to how I remembered him from a few years ago.
“Where are you off to next?” Jonathan asked conversationally.
“I’ll attend the London premiere tomorrow, then head off on a tour across Europe and Australia. I’ll wrap it up in Los Angeles with the third and final premiere by the end of the week.”
He gave me a baffled look. “Man, I don’t envy your life. Touring all those places in less than a week sounds exhausting.”
“The secret is to just go with the flow and not overthink it,” I said. “It helps that they’ll pay me an insane amount of money when it’s all over.”
Jonathan laughed. “For the kind of money you’re making, I’d gladly strip naked and do a world tour.”
“Please don’t,” I said in mock horror, making both of us chuckle.
Then I turned to the audience, where several eager fans were being held back by security.
“So you’re off now?” Jonathan asked.
“After meeting my fans, sure,” I replied. “Can you ask security to let them through in small batches?”
He gave me an unreadable look. “You’re a strange fella,” he noted before doing as I asked.
His surprise made sense. British people—especially Londoners—weren’t typically as open or eager to engage with strangers as their American counterparts. Most celebrities wouldn’t stick around for impromptu autographs and photos.
As soon as the first batch of fans came forward, a girl screeched in delight at the top of her lungs.
I already knew this was gonna be a long week.
(Break)
[Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix] had its worldwide release on November 10, 2006. Warner Bros had spared no expense in promoting the film internationally. Everyone in the industry understood the star power of Troy Armitage, but even more than that, they knew the immense pull of one of the biggest franchises in the world—Harry Potter.
Most films originally slated for release that month were either moved up or pushed back. [Borat], originally scheduled for November 3, was released two weeks earlier in October. Similarly, [Casino Royale] and [Happy Feet], both set for November 17, were postponed by two weeks to clear the way for what was expected to be the biggest release of the year.
Still, no weekend is ever completely dominated by a single film. Two other movies opened in U.S. theaters that same day—[Harsh Times], starring Christian Bale, and [A Good Year], starring Russell Crowe. Both had received mixed to negative reviews, so even their studios didn’t have high expectations. They hadn’t minded releasing them alongside a Harry Potter movie, knowing they wouldn’t be direct competition.
But the hype around [Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix] wasn’t just because of the franchise’s established success. The film was also earning rave reviews from critics, fueling even more anticipation.
“A breathtaking, emotionally charged chapter in the Harry Potter saga. Troy Armitage delivers his most compelling performance yet, capturing the rage, grief, and resilience of Harry in a way that feels utterly raw and real. This isn’t just a blockbuster—it’s a masterclass in character-driven storytelling. Hats off to Rian Johnson.”
— David Byrne, The Guardian
“A darker, more mature Harry Potter film that raises the stakes without losing the magic. Rian Johnson’s directorial debut in the franchise is a triumph, balancing stunning visual spectacle with an intimate, character-driven narrative. The ensemble cast shines, but it’s Armitage who anchors the film with a tour de force performance. I wouldn’t be surprised if this film earns Troy his fifth Oscar.”
— Stella Brock, Empire Magazine
“With dazzling visuals, pulse-pounding action, and a surprisingly nuanced emotional core, Order of the Phoenix proves that this series is far more than just children’s fantasy. Troy Armitage is phenomenal, carrying the weight of Harry’s turmoil with a depth beyond his years. This is the film that truly cements him as one of the finest young actors of our time.”
— Craig Dickson, The Hollywood Reporter
“A spellbinding cinematic achievement. Every element—from the breathtaking cinematography to the flawless performances—works in perfect harmony. The film’s darker tone is masterfully handled, and the final battle at the Ministry of Magic is one of the most thrilling sequences in the entire series. Troy Armitage’s performance is a revelation, elevating Harry’s struggles with a rawness that lingers long after the credits roll.”
— Felicity Evans, Variety
“Not only the best Harry Potter film yet, but a stunningly realized coming-of-age drama wrapped in the trappings of a blockbuster. Armitage’s performance is nothing short of mesmerizing—his portrayal of Harry’s frustration, grief, and defiance is Oscar-worthy. This is the film that proves the franchise has grown up into something adults can enjoy as much as kids. My only complaint is that some of the film’s subtler emotions may go over younger viewers’ heads. Nonetheless, older audiences are in for an unforgettable ride.”
— Chris Winstone, Rolling Stone
The last critique was the only real concern among some reviewers: that the film had matured too much for younger children to fully appreciate. With its dark themes—murder, torture, teenage violence, rage, and depression—woven deeply into the narrative, it was inevitable that not everyone would find it suitable for a younger audience.
Still, the film performed exceptionally well, earning a staggering 92% rating on Rotten Tomatoes with an average score of 8.3/10. It also received an impressive 81/100 on Metacritic, indicating universal acclaim. On CinemaScore, the movie continued the series’ streak of success, scoring another perfect A+ on a scale from A+ to F.
With such overwhelming praise and strong critical reception, only a miracle could have caused this film to fail at the box office.
And, true to everyone’s predictions, it didn’t disappoint.
Comments
elph
Somewhere, in the emptiness that was a Russell Crowe movie theater, Russell screamed.
J
I love that russel crowe always gets screwed over in the background lmfao
Jarod lane
I love this! Tftc!
