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Journal Entry #1: Elias
🕑 Added 2025-07-27 03:49:05 +0000 UTC
Therapist’s orders. She says I need to “process” things instead of just letting them rot in my chest. After what happened last time… yeah, maybe she has a point.
So here it goes.
What’s eating me alive right now? Nevaeh. It’s her. It’s what happened. It’s what didn’t happen.
We finally had sex.
And it was nothing like how I imagined it would be. Not even close. She came over looking anxious but she said she was ready. I asked her if it was because of the whole thing with my ex, and she swore it wasn’t. Said it had nothing to do with that. I believed her.
I brought her into my room… 
It was fast, messy, desperate. I was completely in my head with her. I couldn’t quite find my rhythm. I was nervous, distracted… 
But within seconds, she stopped me. 
Was this the right thing? Probably not. I mean… she doesn’t know how recently Tati and I have hooked up… Even though everything in me was screaming that this wasn’t right… I thought maybe it was just nerves. 
But then, as I was moving inside her, she mumbled a name. Not mine. 
She said it like it slipped out of a dream. 
And the worst part? She didn’t even flinch. 
She was somewhere else. With someone else. 
I stopped. Rolled off of her. Stared at the ceiling in a room that suddenly felt too cold, too quiet... 
I don’t know what hurts more, that she said his name… or that I didn’t walk away the moment she did.
— Elias
Comments
Novami
As she should 😂 he did her dirty first.
Nkakoum
wow
Danee
He's still a cheater he's just gonna use this to justify everything he's done with Tatiana but either way. Nevaeh n Stef 4L
Danee
What....? Omg oh yeah yall kept that up ya sleeves huh?
Shonda Blanks-Bonaney
Wow
Leeiua
I believe he started to like her, that’s why he didn’t walk away when she suggested that they have sex.
Annabelle
I wonder why he chooses to stay in the relationship. He wants this relationship with Nev to work so bad. Is it guilt? Is it a facade to one up Tati? Is it to prove to himself (and/other people) that this relationship is different than the last so it can’t fail, he can’t fail? I don’t get why they’re both clinging to a relationship they know they shouldn’t be in, and I still can’t tell how much Elias genuinely likes Nev
Jamie
That because when Tatianna and Steph first did it was naturally and it didn’t feel force. When Neveah and Elias did it felt force because Neveah overhead Lynn and Tatianna conversation and when Tatianna mention that Elias is super sexual and that she can tell Neveah isn’t putting nothing out made Neveah feel very insecure about her relationship with Elias especially after he told her that he and Tatianna use to date and they have slept together and it was normal in their relationship and now Tatianna is with Steph and it really bothering Neveah deeply then she realize
Lianna Turner Christopher
Hello Jamie, I agree with you that Elias is still one big red flag! I really do not feel any sympathy or empathy for Elias at this time, he knew that this whole encounter was not right....that Nevaeh wasn't right or being honest with herself and him but choose to overlook those facts.
Lianna Turner Christopher
Wow just realized that there is such a huge difference between Elias's first journal entry and Tatianna's first journal entry. The tones are completely different; however, Elias and Nevaeh's are very similar in tone and in feeling. Yes, Nevaeh didn't realize she called Steph's name because she didn't mention it in her journal entry.
Jamie
Yeah, it’s pretty obvious Neveah isn’t ready for a real relationship she should honestly stay single. I had a gut feeling Elias sensed something was off when Neveah suddenly said that she was ready to take the next step with him. I alway felt like she only did that out of jealousy/insecure toward Tatianna. Some people might not agree, but the signs are all there. I mean her dressing sexier during that Halloween episode because she hear people talking about how Tatianna is promiscuous sexy and overheard Lynn and Tatianna conversation. And the fact that she mumbled “Steph” while having sex with Elias without even realizing it just proves she’s still deeply in love with Steph and was never really into Elias. I have a feeling in the next episode of Special Puberty episode, when they dive into Elias’s background, he’s going to mention how he trick Neveah into cut Steph out of her life. Maybe he hoped that would make their relationship work, but clearly, it didn’t especially if Steph is still on her mind. Elias, on the other hand, is still a red flags too. He comes off as kind of a hypocrite too since he and Tatianna hook up recently during the cabin trip and not telling Neveah.
Carmen S
😭❤️ Sheeesh!!!!!! That's cold af
