MatHaz
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Chapter 106: Devils Within
🕑 Added 2021-02-08 12:55:01 +0000 UTC~~~
“Our feelings can become demons that tear our body from the inside,” Liu Jin recites from memory. “My Master told me that once.”
Cultivation goes against the Will of Heaven at a fundamental level. Thus, the path of a cultivator is one full of dangers. Sometimes, they are physical. Sometimes, they are spiritual.
Sometimes, they are one and the same.
“I believe Master wanted to impress upon me the importance of a proper mindset. Of course, back then, I thought Master was being more metaphorical than literal.”
Even though he’s completely surrounded, Liu Jin keeps his voice calm. The sea of black around him does not yet move to swallow him. However, that is only a temporary state of affairs. Liu Jin is all too aware of the hundreds of stares aimed at him. Each one holds the promise of a coming storm. The shades may be content to let him speak for now, but that will not last forever.
Liu Jin needs to make the most out of this false calm.
“It was only later that I learned how true Master’s words were.” It had been, perhaps, one of the most bizarre lessons Liu Jin had received from Old Jiang. “When a high-level cultivator undergoes great emotional turmoil, it is possible for these feelings to coalesce into a new entity. The result is what we call a Heart Devil.”
A Heart Devil must not be confused with an actual demon. Master had made sure to stress that. Demons are born from objects or animals that, after being exposed to ambient Qi for centuries, gain sentience. Once they amass enough power, they become able to take on a humanoid shape. Despite their origins, they have the ability to reason, reflect, and change.
Heart Devils, however, are feelings made manifest, trauma given shape. Their existence is forever defined by the nature of their creation. To be born into this world, they must kill their creator.
Once that happens, they are no more and no less than the feelings of a dead man.
When Liu Jin learned such a thing was possible, he had been scared. It was one thing for his feelings to hamper his cultivation. However, the possibility of his own inner turmoil coming alive to attack him from the inside was too much. It is the reason why young cultivators are not told much about Heart Devils. It is not a burden their minds need.
Of course, Old Jiang had never cared about little things like impressionable ages when designing his lesson plans.
“Doubt. Fear. Hesitation. Those are the sort of feelings that tend to fester within a person. Even if you try to push them down, that will not get rid of them.” Liu Jin frowns. “However, if that was all it took to create a Heart Devil, they would be all over the place.”
~~~
“In the first place, creating a Heart Devil requires one to be at least in the True Realm. An undeveloped soul cannot possibly perform such a feat. If there is a case of someone managing to create one at a lower level, I have not heard of it.” Feng Zhi crosses his arms. He looms over the fallen Wong Shou. “Even then, it is not a common condition. Think about it. If inner turmoil was all it took, most Renegade Realm cultivators would die creating them.”
Which is not to say that has never happened. However, it is by no means a common occurrence. Far from it, in fact. The Renegade Realm encourages a different mindset than the one required for the creation of Heart Devil.
A small mercy. Renegade Realm cultivators are enough of a pain as it is.
“You are in the Spirit Realm, the fourth realm of cultivation, yet you have somehow created not one but hundreds of Heart Devils. Not only that, but you have created them without dying. That is an impossibility. The physical manifestation of a Heart Devil is an extremely rare phenomenon that cannot happen unless a cultivator dies first.”
A Heart Devil is not something that suddenly happens. The existence of a Heart Devil does not start the day the cultivator is killed. Not at all. It is a slow process, and usually, a cultivator will have plenty of time to prevent such an outcome.
Since it is fundamentally an emotional and spiritual problem, fixing it is merely a matter of finding emotional and spiritual balance. That would take away the Heart Devil’s strength and even extinguish it for good. It is only when all else fails that a cultivator is forced to confront the Heart Devil within his own soul, usually after going through a breakthrough. It is rare for things to reach that point and rarer still for the Heart Devil to win.
In other words, it is only when all has gone wrong, and the cultivator is dead, that the Heart Devil can finally manifest in the material plane.
However, Wong Shou is unmistakably alive. The way his Qi permeates through the tower is proof enough. Had he been killed, the Qi of the Heart Devil would have undergone a transformation. It would no longer be felt as Wong Shou’s.
“But don’t you see, Lord Feng Zhi!” Wong Shou cries out. “That is exactly why I cannot—”
“Silence,” Feng Zhi says, instantly shutting up Wong Shou. “It is true nothing about your case adheres to the standard. However, there is one factor that must not be overlooked.”
“What is it?”
“You reek of inadequacy.” Feng Zhi’s golden eyes shine with pity as he looks down on Wong Shou. “I was able to tell that much from the moment we met.”
After all, it is a smell he’s all too familiar with.
~~~
“I do not mean to offend, but Wong Shou’s mental state must not have been the best before we got here. Being forced into a position he did not wish by his father. Having to deal with his uncle and the rest of the Sect pointing out his inadequacies at every turn. Seeing the Sect threatening to split due to his own weakness. It must have been like that.”
Liu Jin sighs. There... had probably been other problems between Patriarch Wong and some of the Elders of the Bright Phantasm Sect. Small things. Big things. However, his insistence on picking Wong Shou ended up being what tipped the scales. It must have been something like that. However, to Wong Shou, it wouldn’t have felt that way. It would have been as if he was the sole problem.
“Wong Shou must have suffered greatly during those days.”
Rather than getting angry at him, the shades are quick to voice their agreement. Spite dripping from their every word.
“Too scared to make choices.”
“Too scared of being hurt.”
“Too scared to stand out.”
“Too scared of the responsibility.”
“How harsh of you,” Liu Jin smiles sadly, “but I guess… you do have that right.”
Wong Shou repressed all those feelings. He bottled them up. However, that could only last for so long. That which is buried will one day be unearthed. There is no escaping that. When you try to run from your fears, you only end up carrying them with you.
And from those feelings, these shades, these Heart Devils, were born.
“I cannot pretend to know how you came to be. It does not match the usual process in the slightest, yet I am certain you must have been born from the feelings Wong Shou kept suppressed. In that sense, there is nothing else I can call you.” Liu Jin raises an eyebrow. “‘Too scared to make choices,’ was it? Is that what you are?”
“No!”
“Yes!”
“I was born…”
“To protect the Bright Phantasm Sect!”
“Destroy it!”
“Leave it!”
“Blame the Eternal Flame Clan!”
“Remove it!”
“Fight it!”
Liu Jin’s eyes are full of sadness. So all along, this has been what they have been dealing with. These Heart Devils are a representation of Wong Shou’s hesitation, his inability to pick a course of action.
They had attacked the Bright Phantasm Sect’s holdings in the Night Forest but had avoided the disciples searching for them at every turn. That was the result of Wong Shou’s resentment and loyalty being at war with each other. The shades could only express Wong Shou’s resentment in ways that did not directly harm the members of the Sect.
However, things changed once the Eternal Flame Clan arrived. Wong Shou’s feelings about them were far less conflicted. This had allowed the shades to battle for the first time. From there, things escalated to targeting the storehouse and his uncle, finally coming into conflict with his own Sect members.
By all means, it shouldn’t be possible. Wong Shou should not be capable of causing something like this. However, there is no point denying it now. Wong Shou has somehow created these Heart Devils. Once Liu Jin puts the improbability of the event aside, it becomes easy to piece it all together.
Now, he just needs to buy a little more time.
~~~
“However, that still leaves the matter of who you are,” Feng Zhi says, looking at the kneeling Wong Shou. Slowly, he starts pacing around him. “You cannot possibly be Wong Shou. I am fairly sure of that. Otherwise, you’d already be dead. You must be a shade, or rather a Heart Devil, just like all the others outside.”
“That... is that what I am?”
Not a denial this time. Feng Zhi’s heart feels a twinge of pity upon seeing the crushed look on Wong Shou’s face. He has to remind himself this is the person who dared to show him that filthy illusion. No, he is not even a person. He is a Heart Devil. Helpless as he may look, Feng Zhi cannot afford to be soft on him.
Even if, once more, it feels like he has become the villain.
Why is it that he so easily falls into the role?
“What else can you be? Can Wong Shou remain alive after all his blood has boiled? Can Wong Shou heal from having an arm shoved through his chest? You have not even realized it yet, but the air you’re breathing right now is superheated to the point even a Spirit Realm cultivator would be in pain. Wong Shou would be dead by now. However, you keep healing.”
Feng Zhi frowns as he finishes his explanation.
“No, that’s not quite it,” he says, placing his hand on Wong Shou’s shoulder. The gesture would be comforting if it wasn’t so ominous. “You are not healing. You are being continuously created by the real Wong Shou. After all, a Heart Devil cannot be born unless it kills the cultivator that has created it, but that is not the case for you, is it? You and all the others were able to materialize without having to kill Wong Shou.”
Once a Heart Devil materializes, it becomes an independent existence. That is why it can continue to exist even after the cultivator it came from has died.
However, what if the cultivator and the Heart Devil managed to exist at the same time? In that event, the Heart Devil wouldn’t be an independent existence.
“You have not been properly born as Heart Devils yet,” Feng Zhi concludes. It is merely a theory, yet it rings true to him. “In other words, your existence is still tied to Wong Shou’s. That is why you cannot die. As an existence, you’re still in the process of being created. Thus, no matter how much I kill you, the real Wong Shou just manifests you again.”
Is that why there are so many of them?
Each Heart Devil is a mirror of Wong Shou’s psyche. A reflection and nothing more. They don’t actually exist yet. Wong Shou hasn’t yet created them. It doesn’t matter if there is only one Wong Shou. As long as you have enough mirrors, you can have a thousand reflections. Is that how it is?
“You should be able to feel it. Some sort of link to the real Wong Shou. Am I wrong?”
“I… I don’t feel anything of the sort!” Even as the fake Wong Shou says it, they both know he is lying. The moment Feng Zhi brings up the possibility is the moment in which he notices it. The link which sustains his existence.
“However, the question remains, what are you? A Heart Devil is born from a cultivator’s psyche, so what exactly is it that you are?”
“What am I?”
“What part of Wong Shou do you represent? What fear? What hesitation?”
“I am...I am…I... I...”
Something snaps. Feng Zhi can almost see the last bit of resistance break in the Heart Devil’s eyes. In that moment, something changes, not just in the Heart Devil but in the entire room.
“Ah, I see. I understand now.”
He vanishes.
Fire immediately rises to cloak Feng Zhi’s body and protect him from the hundreds of blue fireballs fired at him from all angles.
“I understand now, Lord Feng Zhi.” Wong Shou’s voice comes from everywhere at once. There is no more fear or hysteria in it, just quiet confidence. “I know what I am now.”
“Is that so? Since I have done you the honor of holding your hand every step of the way, would you be so kind as to share the answer to which you have arrived?”
“I am the vision of perfection Wong Shou longed for,” the Heart Devil replies. “I am what he aspired to be. I am the one who will quiet down all the ills that plague his heart.”
“And I suppose you will start me?”
The room itself comes alive to attack him.
~~~
Something changes.
A snap. A jolt. It passes through the shades one by one, like a stone thrown into a lake, causing the water to ripple. The Qi of the shades, or rather the Heart Devils, does not grow any stronger or weaker, yet the air is suddenly charged with an intensity that wasn’t there before.
“Ah.”
“I see.”
“It is done now.”
“What is done?” Liu Jin asks.
“We are finished.”
“Properly organized at last. Divided yet whole.”
“You cannot defeat us.”
“I do believe I am being looked down on,” Liu Jin says, “yet I cannot find it in myself to blame you. If I were in your position, I would be confident in my victory. Although, I do not think I’d ever wish to be in your position.”
“You taunt us.”
“It is pointless.”
“Your comrades will not save you.”
“You will be silenced.”
“All will be silence.”
“It is neither a taunt nor a boast.” Liu Jin has already bought all the time he needs. “Devil born from the turmoil in Wong Shou’s heart… I wish to apologize. The nature of your existence is a pitiable one, yet there is no remedy I can offer you. I am far too weak to know how to treat you.”
Liu Jin takes a deep breath.
“All I can offer you is peace.”
And steps into the Spirit Realm.
~~~
AN:
In my outline, this whole thing was supposed to be the last thousand words of the previous chapters. When the time came to write it down, it ended up growing more than expected.
Comments
Gavriel
Finally a plausible way for xian nan to have survived (no way is he dead, the style required to ruthlessly supress the actual clean ending isn't Mat's, the only explanation is that it's a trick, but an honest as he never was seen dead): it was also mentioned that xian nan skipped steps in the past
Gavriel
😂
quantumsoma
My guess for what's going on with Lui Jin's cultivation: he is intentionally bottlenecking himself in order to refine his foundation with Continuously refining breath, instead of allowing it to merely advance him. This means he can break through basically whenever he wants, and will gain a lot of momentum in his cultivation.
Amelgar
lol, Lui Jin follows in Xiao Nan's footsteps. His fate is to be awesome
