endlessjess
patreon
I'm literally in Hell. Here's a ton of new content.
🕑 Added 2016-01-21 13:06:03 +0000 UTC I was gonna save this post for when i had one more blue glow, but i can't finish it because i have no power and life is a nightmare, so i'll just bunch that one in with the next batch of crap.I hope you are all enjoying my many scattered new videos because I have become a machine designed only for creating cool stuff. There are no brakes, and the demon inside me can not be stopped.
Here is my most recent batch of brilliance.
ENDLESS JESS:
Mortality Party
this is something that i filmed in July and never finished putting together. It was meant to be sort of the endless jess spiritual successor to migraine reviews. Weird, esoteric, depressing, pointless, and hilarious. But i accidentally made it too much of those things. It became too powerful to post at the time so instead i got sidetracked with other things and let it rot in the garbage. I finally dug it out, and gave it an editing overhaul. replacing all the really depressing and drawn out parts with really dumb text to speech nightmare fuel instead. Enjoy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lMN0MoxmtC8
Rebuttal.
Anita Sarkeesian made a video about butts so i made a video about anita sarkeesian making a video about butts. It's incredibly stupid and took only 10 minutes to put together so I'm sure it will go viral and be stolen by a million hack facebook pages. Enjoy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0zEuUrUwfp4
MANCHILD INC.
Eat Shredded Wheat.
I made a stupid commercial for shredded wheat using my little pony toys. Obviously it's not a real commercial, i'm not really getting paid by cereal companies it's just a silly gimmick don't drop your pledges please for the love of god i still need all your pledges oh god what is this emptiness what has my life devolved into kill me kill me kill me kill me kill me kill me kill me kill me. Enjoy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HWrpVyHvNwI
(also this is a new thing I'm trying for manchild inc. you'll notice that i added a new pledge reward tier, called "become a manchild inc. sponsor. the basic idea is that for a 25 dollar pledge i'll make a retarded fake commercial shilling something for you, be it a youtube channel or an etsy store or even something you have nothing to do with and just wanna draw attention to. so everybody should become 25 dollars guys. )
THE BLUE GLOW:
Axiom Verge
This game totally absolutely rules and everyone should play it. i still haven't beaten it because i don't have time for fun but the 40 or so minutes i played was basically the best game of all time. Enjoy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nf-9ft4D9iE
Always Sometimes Monsters:
this episode was pretty unique and i put a lot of editing into it. it's a very noir-ish kind of game, so i sort of did a noir style narration blue glow. i think it turned out pretty rad. Enjoy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JYfR0GLfvHk
Pony Island:
I fucking hate this game. Enjoy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4IyE5PoccOQ
SONGS:
'festo (Real Talk)
I recorded this bitchin rap masterpiece the other day on a whim. It's about half random, weird old lyrics that were sitting around my computer, and half off the cuff retarded freestyle that managese to go down some wonderfully bizarre avenues i never would have anticipated. I'm especially proud of the punchline. Enjoy.
https://endlessjess.bandcamp.com/track/festo-real-talk
About a Waifu:
For the anniversary of my bleach video i hastily recorded this brilliant Nirvana Parody. Ichigo and Rukia, what a team. They have a strong bond. you don't want to know about it here. but i'll tell ya one thing. a... baba dook armada shows up. and what are you gonna do then? Enjoy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kqyRLoT8ybM
Little Lost Centaur (Song of the reverse centaur nation):
Colt Corona's been on a rampage uploading my old videos on his idiotic new channel, horseshoe heaven. This was originally a cameo i filmed for Best Guy Ever's Monster Musume video, before being rekajigured into a much more elaborate story driven video on endless jess, and now finally the horseboy himself has uploaded just the parts relevant to him. Amazing. Enjoy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tak1jpF67yQ
Apple Family People:
an old classic from the glory days of drowning in horseshoes, also re uploaded in all it's idiotic glory by Colt Corona.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6gTUCmRF-FI
I think that's it for now. I do have another blue glow in the works, but again i'll just bunch that in with the next cerealized post. Thanks for all the new pledges.
Now that all my new channels are finally up and running I'm going to be putting more effort into this patreon page. I'm gonna be adding some new reward tiers eventually and making the existing ones better. And I'll also be putting more of an effort into these posts, with longer descriptions and updates and bloggery and stuff.
Tell all your friends to pledge because holy shit I'm running myself ragged here and i literally don't know how to stop anymore.
Also I apologize in advance if Cerealized ends up being late again this week. The electric company made a "wacky" mistake and shut off my power (even though i had literally just paid the fucking bill). and when i complained, they said they'd come turn it back on in "15 minutes to 2 hours"
It's been 2 days.
Since there's nothing i can do at home but lay in the dark and freeze, i put my laptop and stuff in a backpack and now I'm squatting in my uncles swanky corporate office building. i stayed here all night after everyone went home, roaming the halls like a spectre of poverty and despair. Now its 8 in the morning and im laying on the couch in the lounge typing this and people are starting to come in to work and wondering why im here oh god somebody shoot me i cant take this awkwardness i just wanna be alone in the comfort of the blue glow and the peaceful seclusion of my endless home zone. but instead here i am at manchild inc. headquarters stealing all the coffee, masturbating in my uncle's secret hot tub, and taking bitter dumps in his fancy bathroom.
One day this wealthy corporate life of privilege will be mine for real. But for now i am but a drifter. Waiting for someone to notice that I shouldn't be here, and tell me to go home to my cold dark house and sit in the blackness waiting for the powers that be to come turn my power back on.
anyways that's my update. enjoy all my cool new content, up your pledges to like 100 dollars and have a nice day!
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You've got to be the most productive squatter in the history of youtube. Now to watch these vids before the snow destroys my internet.
