endlessjess posts
Posts: 1093
Files: 1797
2 Cool Games - Sonic and Bennet Foddy
Here's not 1 but 2 extra fun new blue glows. Like for real these games aren't even bad.The first one is the clumsily named Sega and Sonic All Stars Racing Transformed. This is a racing game starring Sonic Characters, and also real life race car driver Danica Patrick.I obviously didn't plan this but literally as soon as this got posted i look on twitter and find Danica Patrick trending for having crashed and fucking exploded that day.I guess it was her last race too. What are the damn chances of that shit? I've never seen Danica ...
God Of Lore
I know i said no more god of war videos i'm sorry. I had to do this, there's too many god of war raps on youtube and all of them are terrible.I'm sorry for the big patreon watermark on this video, i hate it and i think it looks obnoxious and stupid. It's only on there because videos like this get freebooted constantly.download: https://endlessjess.bandcamp.com/track/god-of-lorelyricsName's Kratos, lookin like a grey ghost i slay the most foes, then raise a toast to war i'm sore, old, cold, and poor i've fought gods b...
GOB OF WOR
hey look i made an actual video for once. I think these are called "video essays" now.This is the part where i usually write a big huge text essay to go with the video essay but there ain't nothing left to say. I feel like I've been talking about God of War for a month straight, and now I hope to never talk about it again.The only addendum i feel necessary to add to this video is that of the game journalists i poke fun of in the beginning, the first one i show, Victor Lucas, is actually a cool guy who i like a lot. He used to ha...
Patron Exclusive - Oldschool Fool Ep2
Hey 3 dollar bois and girls here's your reward tier bonus video for april! Sorry it's a couple days late i was busy doing some humorous thing that i'm too lazy to think of right now, like... swimming in a toilet or teaching dogs to drive race cars or some... stupid shit like that.I know it's only the second episode of this podcast but i really like it. This right here is exactly the kind of content that i wish all content on youtube was. Part of me wants to upload it publicly for everyone, or even make a secret channel just to u...
Bonus Reward - Calling The Classic: Steve Blackman Vs. Kane
Hey 10 dollar bois and girls this one's just for you. It's a special blast from the past from when men were men. By which I mean men were lethal weapons and sometimes demons.Yes, It's The Lethal Weapon, Steve Blackman, Vs. The Demon Kane.Of the two of them? Steve Blackman is definitely the scariest.This is your 10 dollar bonus video, but don't worry, you all still get the 5 dollar bonus video as well. I'm putting the finishing touches on it. It's gonna be extra stupid.
Bonus Rewards - Death Tales W/Digi
This is a terrible game that Digi and I randomly played last summer and immediately forgot about completely. I have no idea how i even got this game. Please enjoy our agitated bewilderment.In addition to this, here's an extra 4 minutes of us waiting for a game to install talking about some pointless bullshit.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=obQWgC9Wl5sSince the pleeb and the weeb ended I've been slowly attempting to figure out what my reward tiers should be, since they've pretty much always been a ridiculous clusterfuck. As usual I d...
Patron Exclusive - Drunk Sonic Mania
Holy crap! What a productive month for once. To thank all the new patrons I got and the old ones who've stuck around this long here's a special exclusive blue glow that only you get to see and no one else. It's a cool sonic game!Also in this post is the 3rd and hopefully last ever God of War blue glow. I didn't want to make any more posts here from the same series of videos so i'm just tossing it in with this much cooler sonic mania video.God Of War Blue Glow - Part 3https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X_qolG9bs3oSo you guys get...
The Blue Glowiest Blue Glow of all time
Incoherent rambling? That's a paddlin.Constant flip-flopping on the quality of the game in question? Thats a paddlin.Running in circles aimlessly accomplishing nothing? That's a paddlin.Completely improvised comedy bits that keep building on themselves and somehow miraculously coming full circle? That's a paddlin.Playing the game really, really badly? That's a paddlin.The amazing joke I'm gonna tell when i get in my canoe? Oh, you better believe that's a paddlin....and that wasn't even the joke. That was a Simpsons r...
My Japanese Animes - The Bullet Club
It's here! The triumphant return of My Japanese Animes! I can hardly imagine the anticipation of all my loyal weebs after a year of ruining my anime channel with The Pleeb and The Weeb. So what's it gonna be?Am I finally gonna do a big in depth analysis on some classic anime? Cowboy Bebop or Evangelion? Or could it possibly be at long last the fabled My Japanese Animes - Cross Ange? Or.... perhaps... something new? Some new popular animu that everyone's talking about, guaranteed to rake in views and actually help my career in some w...
Knob of Door - Blue Glow/Not Review
Here's me being a stupid silly idiot while playing a cool new video game about Hunting Boars, Opening Doors, and babysitting. So much babysitting. It's GOD OF WAR. Epic! Err... no.. wait... I forgot epic was the buzzword for 2008. In 2018 the buzzwords are "mature" and "deep narrative experience".Judging from my incessant complaining in this video you might walk away with the impression that this game is a horrible nightmare, and another sad example of modern Triple A gaming sensibilities mucking about and sullying somet...
Steven Universe Video - A Deeply Sardonic Lament of Exhausted Rage
This blog took a couple of days because by accident of passion, it originally turned out to be a 100 page manifesto about how youtube is the cancer rotting society and must be destroyed. I've arranged to have it released posthumously upon my inevitable fiery martyrdom.Here’s a video about a group of people who i don’t respect and whose lives are worthless. Youtubers, the Beach City townsfolk of real life.The video is also about Steven Universe, i guess. Sort of. If you don’t agree with the “criticisms” of Steven Universe presented...
Mania Madness 2018
Hi friends, who wants to hear me talk about wrestling for 3 hours? Judging from the hundreds of subscribers i immediately lost, absolutely no one! Well too bad! Here's my 6-part review/recap/notreview/analysis/tortured screams of Wrestlemania 34! It's my favorite prolonged night-terror of the year!I actually recorded this spiraling, rambling nightmare for a full 5 hours, but i left a lot of it on the cutting room floor. Stuff that was cut includes a lot of long, pointless tangents about things that don't matter, complaining about th...
Da PleeB WeBE FInALE
That’s all, folks. It’s been a very strange 15 months since we filmed these episodes and it’s taken way too long to get them out. But I put my all into editing them and went the extra mile to make each episode special. You all have my sincerest thanks for your support and patience.The kickstarter for this was thrust upon me without much warning, not to mention the insane promises like future seasons and bonus episodes. Personally I feel I’ve said what I wanted to with this series, so it’s future is up in the air.If there’s ever to b...
Drunken Peasants March
Here are the 3 dp shows i did this month. they still dont pay me for these but thats okay i just want someoen to rub my tummy and feed me my medicine. im gonna die now oh god.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NnhdaaYg5Gohttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u4B66YaiWYchttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-y0N7pKRpYwi would write more but i think this is actually the day i die im passing out now pray for me.
Not a Review Podcast
oh god i m fucking dying . im nauseuous im sick how did this happen. i feel terrible i am literally at deaths door oh god i cant stop puking.this is podcast of reviews on things i hope you like it holy shit
Calling The Classics - Hulk Vs. Sting
A long awaited return to something i actually enjoy, wrestling! Here's my good boi commentary on a classic old man brawl from 2011. I recorded a bunch of these before i left on my trip a couple weeks ago. So far I've uploaded 4 of them, and 3 of them immediately got blocked worldwide for copyright, so i don't know what the hell to do. But this one survived, so this is the one you get to see. Hurry and enjoy before it gets blocked too.If I can figure out a way to get these online and be sure they won't get blocked i will absolute...
Another World W/Digi
A lost night-terror from the darkest depths of Endless Vaults. Here's the time Digi and I descended into true lovecraftian madness while lost on Another World. You've probably seen me play this game before with my Secretary, but this playthrough is at least 3 times as retarded as that one.Gaze in horror as we get stuck on the same part for like a full hour and devolve into Jeff Foxworthy demons from hell.After that we... well actually that continues for the rest of the game.And also the rest of our lives.Some say we're still out the...
Endlett Je at Radcon 3!
Wowie! I actually showed up to this! Who saw that coming? Certainly not me. But how did this happen? What does it mean? Well gather round, my Endless Friends, to hear a wholesome tale.Let me tell you a story about a man, nay, not just a man but a hero. A self-sacrificing martyr whose kind and noble deeds constantly go unheard of and unrewarded. A man whose modesty and mercy has undone him countless times in a world where virtue-signaling and finger-pointing have become the only accepted currency.Please indulge me in taking a small break from be...
Bastards Tale W/ Digi
This is a game about potions and knights. It's a true story.
Altered Perspective??
This is a livestream, i'm doing it right now! Tonight! It'll be up later too, but if you see this in time you can see it live! Ha Ha i am shitting my pants!Also my second appearance on the dp is right here, i came in at about 1:40:00. I was even more nervous the second time but everyone liked me again for some reason.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lCBaNQiqpi0&t=1sDoing these livestreams is seriously the scariest shit in the world. Come watch me just barely conceal a panic attack for hours on end!
Lion King w/ Boozy
It's been called "impossible" on reddit threads since the dawn of the internet. But those people are pussies. If you haven't beaten the Lion king 3 times by the time you're 5 years old you're a little bitch and a little bitch and a little bitch.I am the master of this game, and while everyone else was whining and crying about level 2, i was tossin Scar off Pride Rock on the Sega, on the SNES, on all the systems every day of my life since i was born.Boozy Floozy returns, as the only other person i've ever met besides ...
Abzu w/Digi
Like Rime, this is another lets play from the Legendary Lost Luigi Sessions where Digi and i made like 40 hours of lets plays in 3 days and lost our fucking minds last summer. Some of those turned out good, some of them are horrid abominations, but I'm pretty sure this is one of the good ones.Abzu is a game by the guys who made Journey and Flower, as if that wasn't clear from 2 seconds of looking at it. You know what to expect, a vaguely narrative stroll through a beautiful screensaver environment where at the end you go "huh... oka...
Drunken Peasants/Buttchugger Blog
Up above is my first appearance on The Drunken Peasants Podcast, which to my knowledge is one of the biggest internet/youtube/dipshit podcasts there is. A bustling center of internet pop culture where 100k sub club big shots gather to fiddle their dicks on webcam or something.It was a nice opportunity and pretty cool but forget about that for now, i wanna take this moment to make some words for the only people on this rotten planet who've ever been kind to me and that's you, my lovely patrons. I'm Tony Stark, this is a press confere...
Hello Kitty Sleepover (Patreon Exclusive)
This was recorded way back at Radcon 2 about 40,000 years ago back when people were still cool. We had a grand old time playing hELoo Kiaty Qbe Frnzy on the PLAYDtaion 1. A game i famously reviewed a lifetime ago.Once, i was a boi. I was a little boi, a good boi, a hamboi. I came to the world of shiiiiiiiiiit. There was so much shit and poop and grime and slime and bad bad times that i thought there would never be a day untainted by poopy smells again. But that was before i saw Hlloe Katy. helO Kity was such a good littel girl that we bcame bes...
Summertime Rime (Patreon Exclusive)
This is one of many lets plays that Digi and I recorded together at my house sometime around June, a long ass time ago.They've been sitting on my hard drive not getting edited while i try to focus on everything else. But damn it enough is enough, you patrons deserve to see one of them at least, because i need you to survive.These sessions were a lot of fun and at times very funny and i wish you had heard them sooner. There are so many videos like this on my hard drive, and it's been so long since we recorded and so much fucky shit has h...
OLDSCHOOL FOOL (Patreon Exclusive)
Hey! It's a new series! One that i've been wanting to make forever. I'm still working on the Pleeb and The Weeb and I didn't really want to be posting other stuff in the meantime, so for now this is a Patreon secret that only you guys can see.I came up with the Oldschool Fool gimmick years ago, before even Endless Jess became official. It was meant to be a successor/tribute to my ascended brother in fuckery, Johnny Oldschool. Who is currently living the dream as a real boi far away from the internet.In this video i give the dope...
Highlander: Anime Vs. Real Life!
ooooohhh shiiiiiiit It's the penultimate episode of season 2, where is this clusterfuck going? What's gonna happen? Do you understand life?In this episode we take a look at the 1980-something classic film The Highlander. THEN we take a look at the much worse anime adaptation Highlander Something Something Vengeance. Which is the Pleeb? Which is the Weeb? The answer may surprise you, except it won't. The movie is obviously better than the anime. I guess I just spoiled the episode but let's face it, this show stopped being about w...
Tony Hawk Pro Sk8er
So here I am, doing everything I canHolding on to what I amPretending I'm a supermanI'm trying to keep, the ground on my feetSeems the world is falling down around meThe night's are long, I'm singing a songTo try and make the answers more than maybeAnd I'm so confused, about what to doSometimes I want to throw it all awaySo here I am, growing older all the time,Looking older all the time,Feeling younger in my mindSo here I am, doing everything I canHolding on to what I havePretending I'm a supermanI'm trying to sleep...
The Curse of The Eva - Pleeb Weeb S2E7
Take a moment to appreciate that thumbnail. What a masterpiece. I hope everyone had a good ass Christmas, Kwanza or fucked-up-everything-is-wrong-and-scary-Halloweentown-Christmas. Whatever it is your family celebrates.In this episode i finally decide to review something, the long anticipated Evangelion 3.33: Asuka is (not) a Dog.<3 <3 <3 <3
Kingsglaive - PleebabBWEEbo
The world is a sick and perverted place where liars always get away with it and there is no such thing as justice. Good people are forever at the mercy of those willing to harm others because restraint and forgiveness are a weakness. Selfishness, dishonesty, and malice will always be rewarded as long as it's in line with the warped values of the mob. When the mob comes for you, friends will abandon you at the drop of a hat to protect their own skin. Everything you've built can be torn down in an instant by a handful of dishonest sadists...
